The Biggest Mistakes (and how to fix them)

WEBVTT0:00:00.555 --> 0:00:01.764We could start off the show0:00:01.784 --> 0:00:02.528by bobbing heads.0:00:04.107 --> 0:00:05.468And then people will be like, what's this?0:00:05.508 --> 0:00:06.387Look at all this movement.0:00:06.408 --> 0:00:07.527And there's this happy music.0:00:08.708 --> 0:00:09.288Good morning.0:00:09.349 --> 0:00:10.130Good mid-morning.0:00:11.429 --> 0:00:12.089She's Rebecca.0:00:12.189 --> 0:00:12.730She's Elise.0:00:12.910 --> 0:00:13.330I'm Jimmy.0:00:13.351 --> 0:00:15.651I guess every show needs a name.0:00:15.692 --> 0:00:17.432And we just informally, formally,0:00:17.452 --> 0:00:19.333informally decided the Brunch Bunch.0:00:19.853 --> 0:00:20.634Brunch Bunch.0:00:20.954 --> 0:00:22.035I do a live stream with Dave0:00:22.074 --> 0:00:24.115Kittle and Tony Meritato an hour,0:00:24.275 --> 0:00:24.876two hours ago.0:00:24.896 --> 0:00:25.5568.30 a.m.0:00:25.615 --> 0:00:25.936Eastern.0:00:26.036 --> 0:00:27.077And we call it Breakfast Club.0:00:27.396 --> 0:00:27.977It's as early as you're0:00:27.996 --> 0:00:29.038going to get me out of bed.0:00:29.057 --> 0:00:29.0388.30.0:00:29.437 --> 0:00:30.858In college, that was the earliest class.0:00:30.899 --> 0:00:31.838And I was like, ugh.0:00:33.063 --> 0:00:34.064And then professors are like, you know,0:00:34.084 --> 0:00:34.744when you get a job,0:00:34.784 --> 0:00:37.106it's that time or earlier, right?0:00:37.127 --> 0:00:38.548I was like, no, this is hard.0:00:39.069 --> 0:00:40.511But now I guess we'll do the brunch bunch.0:00:40.591 --> 0:00:44.755So Rebecca is the ED DPT and0:00:44.795 --> 0:00:46.015Elise is the Onco PT.0:00:46.697 --> 0:00:47.317And I'm Jimmy.0:00:47.637 --> 0:00:49.479I think that's what I bring to the table.0:00:49.619 --> 0:00:49.920I'm Jimmy.0:00:49.939 --> 0:00:50.740You're the Jimmy PT.0:00:50.761 --> 0:00:51.762I'm the Jimmy PT.0:00:51.781 --> 0:00:52.362Jimmy PT.0:00:53.124 --> 0:00:54.284Today we're going to talk about,0:00:54.585 --> 0:00:56.186we usually, we normally would do0:00:57.079 --> 0:00:57.719We were getting into a0:00:57.779 --> 0:00:58.960rhythm of reading APTA0:00:59.000 --> 0:01:01.380Magazine and then discussing.0:01:01.700 --> 0:01:02.960Discuss, like coffee talk.0:01:04.460 --> 0:01:04.801Chickpeas,0:01:04.820 --> 0:01:06.361they're neither chicks nor peas.0:01:06.481 --> 0:01:07.561Discuss, discuss.0:01:07.781 --> 0:01:08.623That's a Saturday Night Live bit.0:01:08.722 --> 0:01:09.302Do you not know that one?0:01:09.942 --> 0:01:11.022Nope, don't know that one.0:01:11.043 --> 0:01:12.784Making SNL references that0:01:12.804 --> 0:01:13.483people don't get now.0:01:13.603 --> 0:01:15.125That's when you're this year's old.0:01:15.525 --> 0:01:16.784But the idea was APTA0:01:16.825 --> 0:01:18.105Magazine comes out monthly.0:01:18.325 --> 0:01:20.305We'd read it, talk about it,0:01:20.525 --> 0:01:21.647give you our thoughts.0:01:21.686 --> 0:01:22.266We'd break it down.0:01:22.406 --> 0:01:22.746We'd make it.0:01:23.527 --> 0:01:24.367And then we just kept0:01:24.427 --> 0:01:25.548looking at our mailboxes0:01:27.147 --> 0:01:27.748And it never showed up.0:01:27.787 --> 0:01:29.650And then we realized, Rebecca,0:01:29.670 --> 0:01:30.409you did some research and0:01:30.430 --> 0:01:31.051you found out what?0:01:31.710 --> 0:01:32.891It doesn't come out in January.0:01:32.932 --> 0:01:34.772Like January is the break0:01:34.813 --> 0:01:36.054month for PT Magazine.0:01:36.795 --> 0:01:37.355They have it.0:01:37.415 --> 0:01:38.756It's just not a physical copy.0:01:38.896 --> 0:01:39.716There's a digital copy.0:01:40.037 --> 0:01:40.236No,0:01:40.296 --> 0:01:41.798there's not even a digital copy in0:01:41.817 --> 0:01:42.158January.0:01:42.197 --> 0:01:44.099The digital copy for February is out.0:01:44.180 --> 0:01:44.799So if you're like,0:01:44.819 --> 0:01:46.180can't wait to get to your mailbox,0:01:46.221 --> 0:01:47.382you can download it today.0:01:48.302 --> 0:01:49.644Happy February, by the way.0:01:49.664 --> 0:01:50.823Happy CSM month.0:01:50.903 --> 0:01:51.385I can't wait.0:01:51.465 --> 0:01:51.885Yeah.0:01:51.944 --> 0:01:52.486Yeah.0:01:53.409 --> 0:01:54.290I'm not sure when it's going0:01:54.310 --> 0:01:55.090to hit the mailbox.0:01:55.111 --> 0:01:57.432So now I'm like back on mailbox watch.0:01:57.731 --> 0:01:57.992Yeah.0:01:58.072 --> 0:01:59.412That was a little late on0:01:59.451 --> 0:02:00.753the happy CSM month.0:02:01.132 --> 0:02:01.492So yeah.0:02:01.513 --> 0:02:02.013So anyway, we'll be,0:02:02.033 --> 0:02:03.634we'll be back later with an0:02:03.694 --> 0:02:05.555analysis of the analysis.0:02:05.594 --> 0:02:06.495I don't want to call it an analysis.0:02:06.594 --> 0:02:06.775We'll,0:02:06.795 --> 0:02:08.156we'll chew the fat on the latest0:02:08.195 --> 0:02:09.015APTA magazine.0:02:09.056 --> 0:02:09.697See what's on there.0:02:10.016 --> 0:02:11.736Can we do a few,0:02:11.757 --> 0:02:13.217I'm going to say this into existence.0:02:13.897 --> 0:02:14.859What is the woman's name who0:02:14.878 --> 0:02:15.899does the ethics thing?0:02:17.219 --> 0:02:18.280Oh, she's my favorite.0:02:18.340 --> 0:02:19.460And I don't remember her name.0:02:22.301 --> 0:02:23.181I like her a lot.0:02:23.646 --> 0:02:25.229I read those every- Maria Cohen,0:02:25.250 --> 0:02:25.810Dr. Cohen.0:02:27.314 --> 0:02:27.814Is that who it is?0:02:28.395 --> 0:02:29.936I like her thing a lot0:02:30.036 --> 0:02:32.276because I should not like ethics at all.0:02:32.395 --> 0:02:32.996I'd be like, I don't know.0:02:33.015 --> 0:02:33.836Ethics are sort of boring.0:02:33.937 --> 0:02:35.597And then the way they frame this,0:02:35.637 --> 0:02:36.856the way she does this is0:02:36.877 --> 0:02:38.237she puts it into story,0:02:38.518 --> 0:02:39.198which is a lesson.0:02:39.717 --> 0:02:41.078She puts it into a story and you're like,0:02:41.777 --> 0:02:43.079and it's always difficult, right?0:02:43.199 --> 0:02:44.459It's like, you make the call.0:02:44.538 --> 0:02:45.598It's like, what would you do?0:02:45.658 --> 0:02:47.919And it's like, well, I would do this.0:02:47.939 --> 0:02:49.599And then you're like, would you?0:02:49.780 --> 0:02:51.501And it's like, there's a great way of like,0:02:51.661 --> 0:02:52.461sort of, it just,0:02:52.600 --> 0:02:53.341the goal is make you think0:02:53.501 --> 0:02:54.300there's no right answer or0:02:54.320 --> 0:02:55.461there might be there.0:02:55.641 --> 0:02:56.201There are right answer.0:02:56.822 --> 0:02:57.622don't do the illegal thing.0:02:58.503 --> 0:02:58.903But it would be,0:02:58.924 --> 0:03:00.305I'm going to save this into existence.0:03:00.365 --> 0:03:01.906Maybe we get her on the show once.0:03:02.606 --> 0:03:03.848Does anybody know her?0:03:04.008 --> 0:03:05.688Someone listening knows her.0:03:06.128 --> 0:03:07.971Tell her we're fangirling.0:03:08.591 --> 0:03:09.391I'm fanboying.0:03:09.711 --> 0:03:10.793Is it the gender of the0:03:10.832 --> 0:03:12.834person doing the fanning or the whatever?0:03:13.615 --> 0:03:14.254I like her a lot.0:03:14.335 --> 0:03:14.936I like what she does.0:03:15.015 --> 0:03:15.757And it would be great to do0:03:15.796 --> 0:03:17.057a live one and have her,0:03:17.138 --> 0:03:17.777I would love her thought0:03:17.818 --> 0:03:19.118process when she's writing these.0:03:19.139 --> 0:03:20.740Like, how do you, are these real?0:03:21.181 --> 0:03:22.481Are they based in reality?0:03:22.641 --> 0:03:23.521Like remember law and order?0:03:23.782 --> 0:03:24.223It would be like,0:03:24.983 --> 0:03:26.364There'd be a crazy case in the news,0:03:26.383 --> 0:03:27.145and then two weeks later,0:03:27.164 --> 0:03:28.225there'd be a Law & Order episode.0:03:28.286 --> 0:03:28.506Right.0:03:29.266 --> 0:03:29.927From the headlines.0:03:29.948 --> 0:03:30.307I'm like, dude,0:03:30.328 --> 0:03:31.149this is not... This is0:03:31.269 --> 0:03:32.389copied from the headlines.0:03:32.409 --> 0:03:33.431This is not ripped from the headlines.0:03:33.450 --> 0:03:34.092You copied this.0:03:34.972 --> 0:03:35.233Anyway,0:03:35.252 --> 0:03:36.394I'm saying that into its existence.0:03:36.794 --> 0:03:37.354What we're here to talk0:03:37.375 --> 0:03:38.895about today is... The topic0:03:38.936 --> 0:03:39.415of today is...0:03:40.854 --> 0:03:44.835Mistakes, failures, big ones, little ones,0:03:45.534 --> 0:03:47.514red ones, green ones, one fish, two fish.0:03:47.555 --> 0:03:48.316No, sorry, wrong one.0:03:48.795 --> 0:03:49.656But the idea is like,0:03:49.836 --> 0:03:50.556let's talk about some0:03:50.616 --> 0:03:53.097failures and then how we got over them.0:03:53.157 --> 0:03:54.037And I think this is a good0:03:54.076 --> 0:03:54.997way to number one,0:03:55.257 --> 0:03:56.917remember that a lot of0:03:56.937 --> 0:03:59.397people that you see on stage at CSM,0:03:59.818 --> 0:04:01.177remember Chad Cook saying this once.0:04:01.337 --> 0:04:01.877And he's like, man,0:04:01.918 --> 0:04:02.938I fell a lot or something.0:04:02.959 --> 0:04:03.838Like he was like being,0:04:04.218 --> 0:04:05.378I don't think he was being humble.0:04:05.438 --> 0:04:07.378I think he was just being like, this hat,0:04:07.419 --> 0:04:09.419like you see me as Chad Cook.0:04:10.099 --> 0:04:10.741I think it was Chad Cook.0:04:11.181 --> 0:04:11.461But like,0:04:11.481 --> 0:04:13.825I had to go through not knowing0:04:13.866 --> 0:04:15.187stuff for a long time.0:04:15.609 --> 0:04:16.269A little bit of stuff,0:04:16.310 --> 0:04:17.031then I knew more stuff and0:04:17.050 --> 0:04:17.612I knew more stuff.0:04:18.072 --> 0:04:19.274So I think this is a good way to,0:04:19.935 --> 0:04:21.038I think it's a good way for0:04:21.098 --> 0:04:22.300me personally to get it out0:04:23.040 --> 0:04:24.583And relive that thing again and be like,0:04:24.903 --> 0:04:25.064oh,0:04:25.584 --> 0:04:27.906how can I apply my familiar tools in0:04:27.947 --> 0:04:28.788unfamiliar places now?0:04:28.968 --> 0:04:29.189Right.0:04:29.269 --> 0:04:30.009In the present.0:04:30.050 --> 0:04:30.810How can I use my familiar0:04:30.831 --> 0:04:32.492tools from the past in the present?0:04:33.314 --> 0:04:33.954And it's good to hear the0:04:33.995 --> 0:04:34.815fact that other people0:04:34.836 --> 0:04:36.798screw up because on these things,0:04:36.918 --> 0:04:39.461these cell phones, we see a lot of wins,0:04:39.480 --> 0:04:40.663a lot of highlight reels.0:04:40.762 --> 0:04:41.584I go to ESPN.0:04:42.045 --> 0:04:43.125And I see top plays and I0:04:43.146 --> 0:04:44.105see scores and wins.0:04:44.146 --> 0:04:45.507And on the Instagrams,0:04:45.547 --> 0:04:46.447I see a lot of videos that0:04:46.468 --> 0:04:47.309get a billion views.0:04:47.668 --> 0:04:48.408And my views are only0:04:48.449 --> 0:04:50.471getting 400 or a thousand or nothing.0:04:50.730 --> 0:04:52.932And you're like, I'm in last place.0:04:53.473 --> 0:04:55.093And that ain't, that's not.0:04:56.274 --> 0:04:58.475So who wants to go first in0:04:58.495 --> 0:05:01.077this episode of failure?0:05:01.218 --> 0:05:02.119Or is it mistakes,0:05:02.199 --> 0:05:03.139failure of the same thing?0:05:03.160 --> 0:05:03.480I don't know.0:05:03.899 --> 0:05:04.980I think it's kind of a little bit of both.0:05:05.019 --> 0:05:05.579I'm going to go first0:05:05.600 --> 0:05:06.461because what I'm going to0:05:06.500 --> 0:05:07.360tell you is going to make0:05:07.380 --> 0:05:08.141you feel better about0:05:08.161 --> 0:05:09.043whatever you're going to say.0:05:09.103 --> 0:05:10.663So I'm just going to rip the bandaid off.0:05:11.124 --> 0:05:11.343Let's go.0:05:11.363 --> 0:05:11.925I'm going to tell you a0:05:11.964 --> 0:05:13.386story about a patient.0:05:13.406 --> 0:05:14.906So when I started in acute care,0:05:15.026 --> 0:05:17.288I didn't get a great orientation.0:05:17.309 --> 0:05:18.228I had never even had a0:05:18.269 --> 0:05:19.230clinical in acute care.0:05:19.250 --> 0:05:20.790I didn't really know what I was doing.0:05:20.831 --> 0:05:22.271So I just need you to imagine that.0:05:23.132 --> 0:05:24.314And then I was in the medical ICU.0:05:27.642 --> 0:05:29.805And one of the patients was0:05:30.065 --> 0:05:31.067getting really restless,0:05:31.228 --> 0:05:32.970really wanted to leave the hospital,0:05:33.050 --> 0:05:34.192wanted to go outside,0:05:35.713 --> 0:05:36.654no longer wanted to be there,0:05:36.714 --> 0:05:37.776and was willing to do0:05:37.815 --> 0:05:39.598whatever it took to leave the hospital.0:05:40.139 --> 0:05:42.182And so finally, the physician said, hey,0:05:42.401 --> 0:05:43.362can you please just take0:05:43.403 --> 0:05:44.665this patient outside?0:05:45.665 --> 0:05:46.326And he had, like,0:05:46.367 --> 0:05:48.127a drain coming out of his skull,0:05:48.187 --> 0:05:48.968one of those ones that's, like,0:05:49.009 --> 0:05:50.250sutured into the top.0:05:50.350 --> 0:05:52.112And, like, all of that's, like,0:05:52.351 --> 0:05:53.692on the IV pole.0:05:53.872 --> 0:05:54.853And he's not walking right.0:05:54.894 --> 0:05:56.295We're just going to go in a wheelchair.0:05:57.036 --> 0:06:01.360But so I'm new, suddenly in the ICU.0:06:02.060 --> 0:06:03.161And they want me to take0:06:03.221 --> 0:06:06.144someone out of the ICU into the wild.0:06:06.543 --> 0:06:07.084And I was like...0:06:08.009 --> 0:06:09.791Okay, because I believe in that.0:06:10.031 --> 0:06:11.233I'm like, if you want to go outside,0:06:11.293 --> 0:06:12.214I'm going to try and get you there.0:06:13.475 --> 0:06:14.476But I was so nervous.0:06:14.958 --> 0:06:16.418And the patient knew I was nervous.0:06:16.899 --> 0:06:18.541And he was probably around my age,0:06:18.581 --> 0:06:20.824which also made me feel nervous.0:06:20.903 --> 0:06:21.504And I know you're supposed0:06:21.524 --> 0:06:22.526to always act like you know0:06:22.545 --> 0:06:24.408more than the patient, but it was scary.0:06:24.848 --> 0:06:26.389And so we're going out in the wheelchair.0:06:27.420 --> 0:06:28.701And we hit a bump coming out0:06:28.721 --> 0:06:30.903of the hospital and I'm like, oh my God.0:06:30.963 --> 0:06:31.764And I'm like holding onto0:06:31.805 --> 0:06:33.286the pole and I'm holding onto the thing,0:06:33.346 --> 0:06:34.226remembering that there's a0:06:34.286 --> 0:06:36.608drain in his brain that's0:06:36.627 --> 0:06:38.129attached to this pole and0:06:38.149 --> 0:06:39.149we make it over all the bumps.0:06:39.170 --> 0:06:40.992And I'm like, okay, okay.0:06:41.031 --> 0:06:41.793He didn't fall.0:06:41.872 --> 0:06:42.793The drain didn't fall.0:06:42.812 --> 0:06:43.754Like nothing fell.0:06:44.814 --> 0:06:46.396And then as we're going into the garden,0:06:46.475 --> 0:06:48.057cause we have this beautiful garden,0:06:49.098 --> 0:06:49.358you know,0:06:49.418 --> 0:06:52.420those like differences in the sidewalk.0:06:53.101 --> 0:06:53.281Yeah.0:06:53.502 --> 0:06:54.142Like the paper.0:06:54.942 --> 0:06:55.122Yeah.0:06:55.142 --> 0:06:55.884I hit one of those.0:06:55.903 --> 0:06:56.644Okay.0:06:57.867 --> 0:06:58.807had my hand in front of the0:06:58.846 --> 0:06:59.507patient's chest.0:06:59.588 --> 0:07:01.327Patient didn't go anywhere, but the pole,0:07:01.348 --> 0:07:04.869all the way onto the ground,0:07:05.329 --> 0:07:06.529holding on this guy's head.0:07:06.550 --> 0:07:08.889And I'm like, oh my God, oh my God.0:07:09.110 --> 0:07:10.271And I start panicking, right?0:07:10.290 --> 0:07:11.271And there's all these people0:07:11.350 --> 0:07:13.632around and he's bent forward like this.0:07:13.752 --> 0:07:14.992And it's sutured in so deeply,0:07:15.031 --> 0:07:16.612like it's not actually coming out.0:07:16.713 --> 0:07:18.793It's all fine, but it looks really bad.0:07:19.033 --> 0:07:20.093And he just turns his head0:07:20.113 --> 0:07:20.793and he looks at me and he goes,0:07:21.959 --> 0:07:22.699you need to calm down.0:07:25.541 --> 0:07:26.682I just need you to calm down.0:07:26.923 --> 0:07:27.923You're ruining this for me.0:07:30.665 --> 0:07:32.225And so I picked up the pole,0:07:32.985 --> 0:07:34.107took some cleansing breaths.0:07:34.586 --> 0:07:34.927Yeah.0:07:35.827 --> 0:07:36.627And then we had a great time0:07:36.668 --> 0:07:37.088in the garden.0:07:39.269 --> 0:07:39.649You didn't,0:07:40.569 --> 0:07:41.571your heart rate didn't come0:07:41.591 --> 0:07:42.310down for hours.0:07:42.350 --> 0:07:44.132No, no, no, no, it didn't.0:07:44.211 --> 0:07:44.913And I thought maybe I0:07:44.952 --> 0:07:46.153shouldn't be a physical therapist.0:07:46.192 --> 0:07:47.254I shouldn't be in the ICU.0:07:47.334 --> 0:07:48.175I definitely like was0:07:48.235 --> 0:07:49.134regretting my choice to0:07:49.175 --> 0:07:50.276move into acute care.0:07:50.315 --> 0:07:50.536Like,0:07:51.709 --> 0:07:52.069Not great.0:07:53.211 --> 0:07:53.632All right.0:07:53.732 --> 0:07:55.252Well, laughing about it now.0:07:55.372 --> 0:07:57.274I like how the patient was0:07:57.314 --> 0:07:57.935the teacher there.0:07:58.475 --> 0:07:58.675Yes.0:07:59.016 --> 0:08:00.137Aren't they always, though?0:08:00.156 --> 0:08:00.997Yeah.0:08:01.098 --> 0:08:02.500I'm going to need to calm down.0:08:02.519 --> 0:08:05.242I'm going to need to calm down.0:08:06.862 --> 0:08:08.324I'm glad it didn't come out.0:08:08.404 --> 0:08:09.125I wouldn't want to have that0:08:09.165 --> 0:08:10.567visual in my head the rest of the day.0:08:10.966 --> 0:08:11.086No.0:08:11.487 --> 0:08:12.528I still think about it.0:08:12.548 --> 0:08:13.428I still think about it.0:08:13.488 --> 0:08:15.050Every time I have a patient with a drain,0:08:15.130 --> 0:08:15.370I'm like...0:08:17.269 --> 0:08:18.451The journey my heart rate0:08:18.490 --> 0:08:20.132went on during your story, Rebecca.0:08:20.853 --> 0:08:23.136Oh, my God.0:08:23.435 --> 0:08:24.716So I'll tell a clinical story.0:08:24.737 --> 0:08:26.759But in radio, when we used to use CDs,0:08:26.778 --> 0:08:28.221there would be three CD players.0:08:28.420 --> 0:08:29.541And you were playing one,0:08:29.641 --> 0:08:31.663and then there were two on the way.0:08:32.485 --> 0:08:33.806But inevitably, someone told me this.0:08:34.025 --> 0:08:36.187The CDs were in these little0:08:36.908 --> 0:08:37.669plastic cases.0:08:38.671 --> 0:08:39.491And then you'd push up,0:08:39.511 --> 0:08:40.292and it would pop out.0:08:41.174 --> 0:08:42.196That's how you pop the CD out.0:08:42.916 --> 0:08:43.775And someone told me when0:08:43.875 --> 0:08:44.876they were teaching me how to use it,0:08:44.917 --> 0:08:45.918like you will pop out the0:08:45.998 --> 0:08:46.798one that is playing on the0:08:46.878 --> 0:08:47.698air and then you will be0:08:47.759 --> 0:08:48.859dead air for until you0:08:49.298 --> 0:08:50.279frantically figure out what0:08:50.299 --> 0:08:51.039song to put on next.0:08:51.059 --> 0:08:52.221And I'm like, I'm never going to do that.0:08:53.241 --> 0:08:54.542And then you do that and you0:08:54.562 --> 0:08:55.462get a shot of adrenaline0:08:55.482 --> 0:08:56.543because you realize what you just did,0:08:56.643 --> 0:08:57.224even though the funny part0:08:57.244 --> 0:08:58.384is no one can see you doing it.0:08:58.524 --> 0:08:59.164Like it could have just been0:08:59.205 --> 0:08:59.725mechanical there.0:08:59.745 --> 0:09:00.926You could play it off, but you know,0:09:00.946 --> 0:09:01.285you did it.0:09:01.625 --> 0:09:02.567You get a shot of adrenaline0:09:02.586 --> 0:09:03.966and you feel like an idiot0:09:03.986 --> 0:09:04.768for the rest of the day and0:09:04.788 --> 0:09:05.587you doubt why you're there.0:09:06.729 --> 0:09:08.769But every Rebecca just said,0:09:08.929 --> 0:09:10.410every time I reach for that city player,0:09:11.147 --> 0:09:13.208I thought for a quarter of a second,0:09:13.328 --> 0:09:15.110is this the one I'm not0:09:15.130 --> 0:09:15.731supposed to pop out?0:09:15.751 --> 0:09:17.413Because I've touched the stove,0:09:17.754 --> 0:09:19.154I've burned my hand, and now I'm going,0:09:19.215 --> 0:09:20.996oh, wait, is that the burner that was on?0:09:21.136 --> 0:09:21.697Nope, nope, nope.0:09:21.798 --> 0:09:22.097Okay, good.0:09:22.979 --> 0:09:23.679That's how we learn.0:09:24.019 --> 0:09:24.841We're big, dumb animals,0:09:24.961 --> 0:09:26.001and we learn by that.0:09:26.182 --> 0:09:27.562Like, you have to get burned a little bit.0:09:28.203 --> 0:09:30.025I really appreciate, lately, Jimmy,0:09:30.145 --> 0:09:31.768I've been seeing you posting on, like,0:09:33.034 --> 0:09:34.115How we learn, right?0:09:34.416 --> 0:09:36.476The education and how life0:09:36.798 --> 0:09:38.359is the test and we do the0:09:38.399 --> 0:09:39.278test and we fail the test0:09:39.318 --> 0:09:40.200and then we learn where a0:09:40.240 --> 0:09:41.260school is backwards, right?0:09:41.740 --> 0:09:44.442And I think like my first0:09:44.482 --> 0:09:45.123mistake that I'm going to0:09:45.163 --> 0:09:46.063talk about is a little more0:09:46.104 --> 0:09:46.784on the light side,0:09:46.845 --> 0:09:48.024but I think it is very much0:09:48.065 --> 0:09:49.647like I had to goof it up.0:09:50.106 --> 0:09:50.226Yeah.0:09:50.527 --> 0:09:51.467really badly.0:09:51.788 --> 0:09:53.068And then now I don't make0:09:53.129 --> 0:09:54.690that mistake anymore because I check.0:09:55.149 --> 0:09:56.091So I was working with a0:09:56.130 --> 0:09:58.052patient who had breast0:09:58.072 --> 0:09:59.832cancer and had a mastectomy,0:09:59.932 --> 0:10:02.774like a single mastectomy, one side,0:10:03.015 --> 0:10:04.416one side was the surgical side.0:10:04.456 --> 0:10:05.197The other was not.0:10:05.736 --> 0:10:06.337And so I get it.0:10:06.357 --> 0:10:07.217I'm working with the patient0:10:07.298 --> 0:10:08.418on her shoulder range of motion,0:10:08.438 --> 0:10:08.798whatever.0:10:08.879 --> 0:10:10.360And I'm like 30 minutes in0:10:10.640 --> 0:10:12.322manual stretching, all the things,0:10:12.361 --> 0:10:12.721whatever.0:10:13.261 --> 0:10:15.683And she so kindly was like, Oh,0:10:15.744 --> 0:10:16.965this has felt so great.0:10:17.024 --> 0:10:17.904Are we going to do the same0:10:17.945 --> 0:10:18.885to my other side?0:10:18.905 --> 0:10:19.986And I just,0:10:22.128 --> 0:10:22.707Oh, my God.0:10:23.087 --> 0:10:24.688And I credit my clinical0:10:24.749 --> 0:10:26.250instructor because she was0:10:26.330 --> 0:10:27.269outside and I'm sure she0:10:27.289 --> 0:10:29.230was mentally coaching me from afar.0:10:29.730 --> 0:10:30.811And it was just like, you know,0:10:30.870 --> 0:10:33.673sometimes there's some carryover between,0:10:33.712 --> 0:10:33.932you know,0:10:33.972 --> 0:10:36.214the non-affected to the affected side.0:10:36.254 --> 0:10:37.693So we're just getting that side ready.0:10:37.793 --> 0:10:39.134And now we're going to work on this side.0:10:39.621 --> 0:10:40.523We got to get a baseline.0:10:40.543 --> 0:10:41.482What I wanted to do is I0:10:41.503 --> 0:10:42.903started with the unaffected side,0:10:42.984 --> 0:10:43.945not the good or bad side.0:10:44.784 --> 0:10:45.645I wanted to get a feel.0:10:45.666 --> 0:10:47.82630 minutes is usually what we say.0:10:47.866 --> 0:10:48.547Now you're right.0:10:48.606 --> 0:10:49.707I'm going to switch over and0:10:49.788 --> 0:10:51.448do what Chris Voss from0:10:51.469 --> 0:10:51.969that book would say.0:10:52.308 --> 0:10:53.730Do late night radio DJ voice.0:10:53.769 --> 0:10:54.169Like, yep.0:10:54.850 --> 0:10:55.030Yep.0:10:55.071 --> 0:10:56.731What I'm doing there is I'm0:10:56.971 --> 0:10:57.712switching sides now.0:10:58.613 --> 0:10:59.913I just want you to feel comfortable.0:11:00.033 --> 0:11:02.455I just want to relax before0:11:02.475 --> 0:11:03.436we moved on to that.0:11:03.515 --> 0:11:04.395I just want you to know what0:11:04.436 --> 0:11:05.576it should feel like.0:11:05.876 --> 0:11:06.597And now we're going to get0:11:06.638 --> 0:11:07.577the other side to that.0:11:07.998 --> 0:11:08.278But like...0:11:09.827 --> 0:11:12.691As much as healthcare people mock patients,0:11:12.730 --> 0:11:14.253like, lay on your back,0:11:14.293 --> 0:11:16.595and then they just go, on my back,0:11:16.975 --> 0:11:18.056or with my back in the air.0:11:18.657 --> 0:11:19.918When I would go to get a massage,0:11:19.937 --> 0:11:20.899they're like, on your back.0:11:20.918 --> 0:11:23.280And I'm like, yep, my back.0:11:23.500 --> 0:11:24.341You're going to rub my back,0:11:24.361 --> 0:11:25.582so I need to be on my stomach.0:11:26.063 --> 0:11:26.903They were very clear with0:11:26.923 --> 0:11:27.485their instruction.0:11:28.004 --> 0:11:28.806But our brains are dumb.0:11:30.248 --> 0:11:31.087Especially because you're in0:11:31.128 --> 0:11:32.450this weird spot, too.0:11:32.470 --> 0:11:33.370Like, what do I...0:11:34.937 --> 0:11:35.576I see it a lot,0:11:35.636 --> 0:11:36.597and I saw it a lot with a0:11:36.738 --> 0:11:38.479stand-up comedian will do it with cops.0:11:38.619 --> 0:11:40.479He was mocking police officers.0:11:40.979 --> 0:11:41.879And not to mock cops,0:11:41.940 --> 0:11:42.779but they're in a0:11:42.820 --> 0:11:43.720high-pressure situation0:11:44.221 --> 0:11:45.821trying to get someone to do something.0:11:46.301 --> 0:11:47.062So a lot of times,0:11:47.721 --> 0:11:48.682forget what comedian it was.0:11:48.721 --> 0:11:48.981He's like,0:11:49.062 --> 0:11:50.302I'm going to go ahead and ask0:11:50.342 --> 0:11:52.124you to turn the car off.0:11:52.144 --> 0:11:53.063I'm going to go ahead and0:11:53.144 --> 0:11:54.484ask you to get out of the car.0:11:54.565 --> 0:11:55.345And the guy was like...0:11:55.924 --> 0:11:56.826Are you going to ask me?0:11:56.905 --> 0:11:58.046Are you asking me to do that?0:11:58.346 --> 0:11:58.947And then a lot of times0:11:58.966 --> 0:11:59.767you'll get multiple0:11:59.807 --> 0:12:00.768instructions at the same time.0:12:00.788 --> 0:12:02.528Hands up, hands up, put your hands up,0:12:02.568 --> 0:12:03.330put your hands behind your back,0:12:03.370 --> 0:12:04.190put your hands behind your head,0:12:04.269 --> 0:12:04.830interlock it.0:12:05.130 --> 0:12:06.331But open the door and you're like,0:12:07.011 --> 0:12:07.812which one of those things0:12:07.831 --> 0:12:08.773do you want me to do right now?0:12:08.793 --> 0:12:09.513Because this is the first0:12:09.533 --> 0:12:10.714time I've been in this situation.0:12:10.813 --> 0:12:12.014And a lot of times patience0:12:12.075 --> 0:12:12.634is the first time I've been0:12:12.654 --> 0:12:14.155in that situation on my0:12:14.176 --> 0:12:15.736stomach or you want to my0:12:15.777 --> 0:12:18.719stomach up or the we do we flip flop.0:12:19.172 --> 0:12:20.673This is kind of like related unrelated,0:12:20.712 --> 0:12:22.113but I found an Instagram0:12:22.153 --> 0:12:23.094account yesterday called0:12:23.134 --> 0:12:24.033Emergency Resilience.0:12:24.053 --> 0:12:25.475Okay.0:12:25.495 --> 0:12:26.956And it is really interesting.0:12:27.056 --> 0:12:28.275And one of the things this0:12:28.316 --> 0:12:29.437person teaches people is0:12:29.537 --> 0:12:30.476how to do death0:12:30.537 --> 0:12:31.918notifications appropriately.0:12:33.283 --> 0:12:34.365And one of the things she0:12:34.404 --> 0:12:36.366posted was all the ways0:12:36.447 --> 0:12:37.769that people talk around it0:12:37.948 --> 0:12:39.110are confusing and hurtful0:12:39.149 --> 0:12:40.532to the person that you're notifying.0:12:40.991 --> 0:12:42.214So like, just like you were saying,0:12:42.234 --> 0:12:43.554the too many instructions, they're like,0:12:43.595 --> 0:12:45.677the person's passed, they're gone,0:12:45.898 --> 0:12:47.219they're not with us anymore.0:12:47.460 --> 0:12:48.260And they were like,0:12:48.301 --> 0:12:49.221family members were like,0:12:49.361 --> 0:12:50.182where did they go?0:12:52.325 --> 0:12:53.926Are they at a different hospital?0:12:54.066 --> 0:12:55.366Like they didn't make it,0:12:55.407 --> 0:12:56.307didn't make what?0:12:56.408 --> 0:12:57.528Like they weren't in surgery.0:12:57.568 --> 0:12:58.909Like what, what happened?0:12:59.370 --> 0:12:59.770And she said,0:12:59.791 --> 0:13:00.932it's really crucial to0:13:01.011 --> 0:13:02.092actually like use the words0:13:02.212 --> 0:13:04.075dead or died and that it's0:13:04.115 --> 0:13:06.256like the most effective way to do that.0:13:06.336 --> 0:13:07.157And so I think about how0:13:07.216 --> 0:13:08.958many times I'm communicating.0:13:09.078 --> 0:13:10.740I mean, not that serious of things,0:13:10.799 --> 0:13:12.442but how unclearly am I0:13:12.501 --> 0:13:13.383communicating and what0:13:13.442 --> 0:13:14.744words should I really be using?0:13:14.764 --> 0:13:15.303Yeah.0:13:15.965 --> 0:13:16.985The military uses,0:13:17.046 --> 0:13:18.187have you guys ever heard of bluff?0:13:19.616 --> 0:13:20.457The military uses this0:13:20.538 --> 0:13:21.859acronym bottom line up front.0:13:22.418 --> 0:13:23.779And a lot of innovation0:13:23.840 --> 0:13:26.322comes out of military or cops, firemen,0:13:26.361 --> 0:13:26.461EMTs,0:13:26.481 --> 0:13:28.143because it's like sort of important0:13:28.623 --> 0:13:29.443to get the message right.0:13:29.563 --> 0:13:30.024Like now.0:13:30.304 --> 0:13:31.384So bottom line up front is0:13:31.404 --> 0:13:33.267like the third sentence in0:13:33.287 --> 0:13:34.187your message should not be0:13:34.206 --> 0:13:34.927the patient is dead.0:13:35.388 --> 0:13:36.889That's that's the subject line.0:13:36.969 --> 0:13:38.950That is in journalism.0:13:38.990 --> 0:13:40.812It's what they call the inverted pyramid.0:13:41.710 --> 0:13:42.910It's a it's a pyramid that's0:13:42.971 --> 0:13:44.412wide of a top and pointy at the bottom.0:13:44.451 --> 0:13:45.472Read any news story or any0:13:45.592 --> 0:13:46.553good blog article.0:13:46.634 --> 0:13:48.174And the most important stuff is the top.0:13:48.635 --> 0:13:48.816Right.0:13:49.155 --> 0:13:49.736It should be structured0:13:49.756 --> 0:13:50.397because a lot of times0:13:50.456 --> 0:13:51.398people don't make it to the bottom.0:13:51.518 --> 0:13:53.980So you better bottom line up front.0:13:54.340 --> 0:13:55.620I know it's the bottom line0:13:55.761 --> 0:13:57.623because in math,0:13:57.883 --> 0:13:58.663the answer is at the bottom.0:13:58.943 --> 0:13:59.163Right.0:13:59.384 --> 0:14:00.706Forty two plus sixty two.0:14:00.745 --> 0:14:02.866And the answer to the bottom flip it.0:14:03.628 --> 0:14:04.629Bottom line is going to be up front.0:14:05.369 --> 0:14:06.690If I were to suggest a book,0:14:07.390 --> 0:14:08.751it would be smart brevity.0:14:10.264 --> 0:14:13.486This guy, Dave Pavo, gave me a compliment.0:14:13.527 --> 0:14:15.488He was like, you've read Smart Brevity.0:14:15.508 --> 0:14:15.748I was like,0:14:15.768 --> 0:14:16.908I have no idea what you're talking about.0:14:17.408 --> 0:14:17.948And he's like,0:14:18.188 --> 0:14:18.850have you guys ever heard of0:14:18.909 --> 0:14:20.149Politico or Axios?0:14:20.350 --> 0:14:21.650They're like political whatever,0:14:21.750 --> 0:14:22.371but that's not why.0:14:22.951 --> 0:14:23.532They sort of,0:14:23.611 --> 0:14:25.513they went from being writers0:14:25.572 --> 0:14:27.394at like the Washington Post or whatever,0:14:27.413 --> 0:14:28.815these big news outlets that0:14:28.835 --> 0:14:29.775would write three, four,0:14:29.775 --> 0:14:31.4165,000 word articles.0:14:32.517 --> 0:14:34.118And then when journalism went online,0:14:34.138 --> 0:14:35.839they could measure how far0:14:35.918 --> 0:14:37.399people went or how long0:14:37.440 --> 0:14:39.660they read and where they thought0:14:40.296 --> 0:14:41.596I wrote a 4,000 word article.0:14:41.636 --> 0:14:43.256It's my 4,000 word article0:14:43.277 --> 0:14:43.837is better than your0:14:43.857 --> 0:14:44.697thousand word article.0:14:45.979 --> 0:14:47.259Not if I use a thousand of the best,0:14:47.339 --> 0:14:47.980better words.0:14:48.279 --> 0:14:48.500Right.0:14:48.820 --> 0:14:49.460And they were able to0:14:49.620 --> 0:14:50.900measure now that journalism0:14:50.941 --> 0:14:52.381went digital and they found0:14:52.522 --> 0:14:54.623this smart brevity format0:14:55.302 --> 0:14:55.842and you've read it,0:14:55.923 --> 0:14:56.724whether you know it or not,0:14:56.783 --> 0:14:58.784a lot of brands that write0:14:59.085 --> 0:15:00.504words and these are words0:15:00.725 --> 0:15:05.388or scripts for videos because videos 15,0:15:05.388 --> 0:15:05.947five years ago.0:15:06.908 --> 0:15:08.009Just shorts now.0:15:08.570 --> 0:15:09.769We can now transmit more0:15:09.789 --> 0:15:11.110information in a 60 second0:15:11.150 --> 0:15:12.331or less short than people0:15:12.370 --> 0:15:13.490did in a 10 minute video.0:15:14.851 --> 0:15:16.131And the scientific principle0:15:16.172 --> 0:15:19.533there is signal versus noise ratio.0:15:19.854 --> 0:15:20.813So there's a lot of noise,0:15:21.014 --> 0:15:21.734but you need that one0:15:21.754 --> 0:15:22.575little message to go.0:15:22.715 --> 0:15:22.894Great.0:15:22.975 --> 0:15:24.294Bottom line up front or0:15:24.375 --> 0:15:27.096smart brevity or tell me0:15:27.436 --> 0:15:29.317the question in the book, smart brevity.0:15:29.476 --> 0:15:30.397You don't even need to buy it now.0:15:30.437 --> 0:15:31.337I just gave you all the good parts.0:15:31.937 --> 0:15:32.837The question they always say is,0:15:32.957 --> 0:15:34.119are you telling me0:15:34.139 --> 0:15:34.798something I don't know?0:15:35.854 --> 0:15:37.115And if the answer is no,0:15:37.355 --> 0:15:37.916I'm telling you something0:15:37.936 --> 0:15:40.636you do know is why you're writing this.0:15:40.738 --> 0:15:41.518We've all seen this, though.0:15:41.597 --> 0:15:42.739This meeting could have been an email.0:15:43.038 --> 0:15:44.900That's the opposite of smart brevity.0:15:45.421 --> 0:15:46.140Why did we do this?0:15:46.240 --> 0:15:47.282This could have been an email.0:15:47.402 --> 0:15:48.942Do you want to know why a0:15:48.982 --> 0:15:50.585lot of meetings that could0:15:50.605 --> 0:15:51.664have been an email are meetings?0:15:52.306 --> 0:15:52.645Emotion.0:15:52.846 --> 0:15:54.847People want to attend.0:15:55.368 --> 0:15:56.208They think that they need to0:15:56.269 --> 0:15:57.328transmit the emotion.0:15:57.369 --> 0:15:57.970And by doing that,0:15:57.990 --> 0:15:58.509they're going to talk to0:15:58.529 --> 0:15:59.051you for 20 minutes.0:15:59.955 --> 0:16:01.677That's too much noise and no signal.0:16:01.756 --> 0:16:02.538But you leave and you're like,0:16:02.918 --> 0:16:03.658what was that about?0:16:03.678 --> 0:16:04.740We've all had those meetings.0:16:05.039 --> 0:16:06.020A friend of mine was talking0:16:06.360 --> 0:16:07.361about this meeting yesterday.0:16:07.903 --> 0:16:11.866Her kids' dance group, team, company,0:16:11.907 --> 0:16:13.408whatever, where the kids go to dance.0:16:13.869 --> 0:16:14.589They had this meeting with0:16:14.609 --> 0:16:15.370the instructors and they're like,0:16:15.389 --> 0:16:16.971there's too much this.0:16:17.011 --> 0:16:17.972And at the end, I was like,0:16:17.993 --> 0:16:18.592what was the meeting about?0:16:18.633 --> 0:16:19.153She's like, I don't know.0:16:19.894 --> 0:16:20.575Sounds like they're mad.0:16:20.835 --> 0:16:21.296I'm like, okay,0:16:21.336 --> 0:16:22.277I didn't have that emotion.0:16:24.138 --> 0:16:25.220But smart brevity.0:16:25.259 --> 0:16:29.325So I like this, which is get to the point.0:16:29.546 --> 0:16:30.187And you don't need to be0:16:31.087 --> 0:16:32.490sterile or insincere about it,0:16:33.130 --> 0:16:34.312but you need to clearly communicate it,0:16:34.392 --> 0:16:36.596especially in situations0:16:36.696 --> 0:16:38.398like death or something serious.0:16:39.211 --> 0:16:41.514Do you want, so hearing both of you,0:16:41.594 --> 0:16:42.214I was going to tell a0:16:42.254 --> 0:16:43.575different failure that was0:16:43.695 --> 0:16:45.197not nearly as impactful or funny,0:16:45.417 --> 0:16:46.918but I'll tell a one that's recent.0:16:47.317 --> 0:16:49.419So as some of you guys know,0:16:49.460 --> 0:16:50.200but some people may not,0:16:50.240 --> 0:16:52.302my dad had a stroke seven months ago.0:16:53.442 --> 0:16:53.863Awesome.0:16:53.883 --> 0:16:54.984I have $150,000 degree.0:16:55.384 --> 0:16:55.945I'm prepared for this.0:16:56.325 --> 0:16:57.125No physical issues.0:16:57.466 --> 0:16:58.606Everything's, everything's a failure.0:16:59.206 --> 0:17:01.648So my degree, awesome, doesn't work.0:17:02.048 --> 0:17:03.729I mean, I'm sure it helps, but like,0:17:04.308 --> 0:17:05.009I have to, I'm like,0:17:05.250 --> 0:17:07.029I have no speech training, right?0:17:07.089 --> 0:17:08.691Speech language pathologists0:17:08.711 --> 0:17:10.031are my friends and several0:17:10.071 --> 0:17:10.951are friends and have helped me.0:17:11.051 --> 0:17:11.432So thank you.0:17:13.093 --> 0:17:13.532I am,0:17:13.573 --> 0:17:14.874my dad's home for a couple of months0:17:14.993 --> 0:17:16.294at my house and it's,0:17:16.433 --> 0:17:18.515it was nicer out and I'm, my dad's fine.0:17:18.555 --> 0:17:20.276He's moving around the house just fine.0:17:20.836 --> 0:17:22.196And the air conditioning0:17:22.237 --> 0:17:23.557breaks and my dad does not0:17:23.617 --> 0:17:24.357deal well in heat.0:17:25.030 --> 0:17:25.451So I'm like,0:17:25.550 --> 0:17:26.991I'm working on the air conditioner.0:17:27.211 --> 0:17:27.852I'm working on it.0:17:27.872 --> 0:17:28.833I have no idea what I'm doing,0:17:28.873 --> 0:17:30.073but I'm trying to solve the problem here.0:17:30.873 --> 0:17:33.153And I say, I think I'm smart.0:17:33.654 --> 0:17:34.355Go jump in the car.0:17:34.654 --> 0:17:35.815The air conditioner in the car will work.0:17:36.736 --> 0:17:37.895In 92 seconds, you'll be cold.0:17:38.576 --> 0:17:39.237And he goes, okay.0:17:40.116 --> 0:17:40.717So he's in the car.0:17:41.198 --> 0:17:42.518My back is to the driveway.0:17:42.557 --> 0:17:43.578I'm in the house on the0:17:43.618 --> 0:17:45.159porch working on the air conditioner.0:17:45.318 --> 0:17:46.619I have no idea what I'm doing.0:17:48.068 --> 0:17:49.470And my buddy is facing me0:17:49.710 --> 0:17:52.051now looking to the driveway and he goes,0:17:52.653 --> 0:17:55.555um, your dad's driving the car.0:17:56.035 --> 0:17:57.435And I was like, so my dad's just,0:17:57.576 --> 0:17:58.356I need to paint the picture.0:17:58.517 --> 0:18:00.479Should not be driving a car at that point.0:18:00.818 --> 0:18:01.599Should not be driving a car.0:18:02.834 --> 0:18:05.296And my mistake was I then0:18:05.596 --> 0:18:06.817let emotion take over and I0:18:06.896 --> 0:18:07.836freaked out because I ran0:18:07.896 --> 0:18:09.699downstairs like a pissed0:18:09.759 --> 0:18:12.039parent and opened the door0:18:12.160 --> 0:18:13.060and what are you doing?0:18:13.141 --> 0:18:14.080And I reached in and grabbed0:18:14.102 --> 0:18:14.741the keys and I was like,0:18:14.761 --> 0:18:15.722you can't be driving a car0:18:16.403 --> 0:18:17.243because I was like,0:18:17.384 --> 0:18:18.724if you had just jammed on the gas,0:18:18.805 --> 0:18:19.265I don't know if you're0:18:19.285 --> 0:18:19.765going to jam on the gas.0:18:19.785 --> 0:18:20.405You would have driven into0:18:20.425 --> 0:18:23.268the pool or something.0:18:23.288 --> 0:18:24.347You would have hurt yourself or others.0:18:24.808 --> 0:18:25.929And I let emotion take over.0:18:26.509 --> 0:18:27.810And then my dad spiraled for0:18:27.830 --> 0:18:30.152the rest of the day and it didn't help.0:18:30.231 --> 0:18:31.613I let my emotion take over.0:18:32.520 --> 0:18:34.782um, take over because I was scared.0:18:35.083 --> 0:18:35.282Right.0:18:35.303 --> 0:18:36.624So fear comes to the top of0:18:36.683 --> 0:18:38.445us where I could have said, well,0:18:38.486 --> 0:18:39.665he was in park when I did it.0:18:39.686 --> 0:18:40.527Right.0:18:40.547 --> 0:18:41.847So crisis averted.0:18:42.107 --> 0:18:42.307Right.0:18:42.729 --> 0:18:43.849So how do you need to react0:18:43.869 --> 0:18:44.450in that moment?0:18:45.151 --> 0:18:47.172Uh, how I reacted wasn't it.0:18:47.913 --> 0:18:49.012So that was a fun mistake.0:18:49.032 --> 0:18:50.654And we laughed about it now because he was,0:18:50.795 --> 0:18:50.974I was,0:18:51.075 --> 0:18:51.996cause I looked at him at my buddy0:18:52.016 --> 0:18:53.317and I was like, he's not driving the car.0:18:53.336 --> 0:18:54.317Do you know why he drove the car?0:18:55.458 --> 0:18:56.338It was a smart idea.0:18:56.459 --> 0:18:57.420He was in the driveway,0:18:57.539 --> 0:18:58.279the air conditioner was running.0:18:58.319 --> 0:18:59.000So he was cool.0:18:59.993 --> 0:19:00.996But the car was in a part of0:19:01.016 --> 0:19:01.938the driveway that was sunny.0:19:02.558 --> 0:19:03.039And he was like, well,0:19:03.059 --> 0:19:03.781there's shade right there.0:19:03.801 --> 0:19:04.743I'll just move it in the shade.0:19:04.844 --> 0:19:05.826So it was logical.0:19:06.748 --> 0:19:08.230And he did drive the car well.0:19:08.391 --> 0:19:09.153Better if he parked it0:19:09.173 --> 0:19:10.174better than a lot of people I know.0:19:12.364 --> 0:19:13.605who park in my driveway and0:19:13.644 --> 0:19:15.865you know who you are um but0:19:16.086 --> 0:19:18.968it was why is the email or0:19:18.988 --> 0:19:19.588the meeting that could have0:19:19.608 --> 0:19:20.229been an email an email0:19:20.348 --> 0:19:21.849emotion why do we dance0:19:21.930 --> 0:19:23.111around death notification0:19:23.511 --> 0:19:25.712our emotion agreed so0:19:26.413 --> 0:19:27.834that's where bluff or smart0:19:27.854 --> 0:19:28.994brevity it takes it out0:19:29.154 --> 0:19:31.477it's like okay what is your0:19:31.537 --> 0:19:33.817job here convey the message0:19:34.278 --> 0:19:35.619be clarity and that's this0:19:35.660 --> 0:19:36.700is also part of my talk at0:19:36.720 --> 0:19:37.861csm and I didn't think I0:19:37.881 --> 0:19:39.122was gonna have a pitch for0:19:39.142 --> 0:19:41.743it but under start with the end in mind0:19:42.503 --> 0:19:43.844If your goal in scientific0:19:43.884 --> 0:19:45.644research is to achieve understanding,0:19:46.744 --> 0:19:48.165maybe you don't need 4,000 words.0:19:48.365 --> 0:19:50.445Maybe you need 15 good words.0:19:51.307 --> 0:19:53.948And also my session at CSM0:19:54.008 --> 0:19:56.468is published as the 15 yard line.0:19:56.488 --> 0:19:57.107It's not the end zone.0:19:57.148 --> 0:19:58.308You're still a couple of yards away.0:19:58.909 --> 0:19:59.929So I'm going to tell you about this.0:20:00.009 --> 0:20:00.890I told Rebecca about this.0:20:01.930 --> 0:20:02.630I'm doing a fake.0:20:02.930 --> 0:20:03.810I'm doing like a skit,0:20:03.851 --> 0:20:04.830like a fake football.0:20:06.030 --> 0:20:08.211No, this is new since we last chatted.0:20:09.036 --> 0:20:10.878Sheila Schindler-Ivins is my co-presenter,0:20:11.440 --> 0:20:13.903and she is the opposite of me.0:20:14.104 --> 0:20:15.266If we are the odd couple, she's...0:20:16.279 --> 0:20:16.839I'm Oscar.0:20:16.880 --> 0:20:18.059She's the other guy,0:20:18.079 --> 0:20:19.300the guy who's like put together.0:20:19.500 --> 0:20:20.381I'm the crazy guy.0:20:21.240 --> 0:20:22.221And she's a researcher.0:20:22.401 --> 0:20:23.020And I said, Sheila,0:20:23.101 --> 0:20:24.240I think I want to convey0:20:24.280 --> 0:20:25.461this gap because we love0:20:25.501 --> 0:20:26.321that phrase in science.0:20:26.521 --> 0:20:27.221We'll bridge the gap.0:20:27.642 --> 0:20:29.221But I want to do a gap in football terms.0:20:29.241 --> 0:20:30.342And she goes, I don't know football terms.0:20:30.382 --> 0:20:30.561I go,0:20:30.582 --> 0:20:31.643you don't need to know football terms.0:20:31.923 --> 0:20:32.643I'm going to do football.0:20:32.682 --> 0:20:33.442You're going to do science,0:20:33.982 --> 0:20:35.682receiving the kick, getting grant funding,0:20:35.982 --> 0:20:37.963running plays, doing science,0:20:38.284 --> 0:20:41.003like running play science analysis.0:20:41.084 --> 0:20:42.104And although in the booth,0:20:42.124 --> 0:20:42.924the offensive corner0:20:42.964 --> 0:20:43.484dinners and they're0:20:43.724 --> 0:20:45.085reviewing the iPads and all that stuff.0:20:45.865 --> 0:20:47.207but then I said I need to I0:20:47.227 --> 0:20:48.970want to I want a story to0:20:49.109 --> 0:20:50.551show that getting published0:20:50.853 --> 0:20:52.074is an accomplishment it is0:20:52.134 --> 0:20:53.296a checkpoint it is a first0:20:53.316 --> 0:20:55.358down along the way to your0:20:55.538 --> 0:20:56.601ultimate goal which when we0:20:56.641 --> 0:20:57.942started this we decided was0:20:57.982 --> 0:21:01.248understanding not having been published0:21:02.664 --> 0:21:03.705I don't go to the gym to0:21:03.766 --> 0:21:04.846have gone to the gym.0:21:04.967 --> 0:21:06.847I'd go to the gym to achieve an outcome.0:21:07.387 --> 0:21:08.848Publishing is not an, publishing's,0:21:09.108 --> 0:21:09.750maybe I'm saying this wrong.0:21:09.930 --> 0:21:10.951Publishing is an outcome,0:21:11.270 --> 0:21:12.030but it's not the ultimate outcome.0:21:12.050 --> 0:21:12.852It's not the final outcome.0:21:13.051 --> 0:21:14.192You started by receiving the0:21:14.232 --> 0:21:15.173kick to score a touchdown.0:21:16.114 --> 0:21:16.994So in the story,0:21:18.315 --> 0:21:19.455the Bunsen burners are0:21:19.496 --> 0:21:20.497playing the pseudoscience0:21:20.596 --> 0:21:21.998quacks in the logic bowl0:21:22.157 --> 0:21:24.619and it's two minutes and the team science,0:21:24.660 --> 0:21:26.780team Bunsen burners,0:21:26.961 --> 0:21:28.321they're marching down and if they score,0:21:28.342 --> 0:21:28.761they win.0:21:28.781 --> 0:21:30.703But oh, inexplicably, they take a knee.0:21:31.778 --> 0:21:34.099And the 15, they're like, we did it.0:21:34.780 --> 0:21:35.661And the whole stadium is like,0:21:35.701 --> 0:21:37.163why didn't you take a shot0:21:37.182 --> 0:21:37.702at the end zone?0:21:37.722 --> 0:21:38.282You had it.0:21:39.825 --> 0:21:40.525I also want to show the0:21:40.565 --> 0:21:41.286researchers that they're0:21:41.306 --> 0:21:42.807not necessarily all at fault,0:21:43.047 --> 0:21:43.768but you still are0:21:43.807 --> 0:21:45.148responsible because that's0:21:45.169 --> 0:21:45.869how they're rewarded.0:21:45.890 --> 0:21:46.871They're rewarded for getting0:21:46.891 --> 0:21:48.132to the 15 over and over again.0:21:48.652 --> 0:21:49.692And then we're confused why0:21:49.712 --> 0:21:50.973they're 17 years from publish,0:21:52.055 --> 0:21:52.996bench to bedside or whatever.0:21:53.375 --> 0:21:55.738I'm like, well,0:21:56.018 --> 0:21:56.618why don't you just hand it0:21:56.638 --> 0:21:57.278to Marshawn Lynch?0:21:57.298 --> 0:21:57.819He'll punch it in.0:21:58.648 --> 0:22:01.051But we stop because they0:22:01.092 --> 0:22:01.712don't have the tools,0:22:01.752 --> 0:22:02.653the training and the time0:22:03.013 --> 0:22:04.756or incentivization.0:22:04.776 --> 0:22:05.457You don't get any more.0:22:05.477 --> 0:22:07.558And it's not about money for researchers.0:22:07.699 --> 0:22:08.579I'm not saying this,0:22:08.980 --> 0:22:10.082but it's about like your0:22:10.182 --> 0:22:12.884time is being tracked, right?0:22:12.904 --> 0:22:13.786Like your boss isn't going0:22:13.806 --> 0:22:14.626to be paying you for0:22:14.666 --> 0:22:16.048something you're not being rewarded for.0:22:16.348 --> 0:22:16.990System's broken.0:22:18.601 --> 0:22:19.741I'm going to give so okay0:22:19.821 --> 0:22:20.982great thanks jimmy doom and0:22:21.002 --> 0:22:22.104gloomy but I'm going to0:22:22.144 --> 0:22:23.204show people 15 different0:22:23.244 --> 0:22:24.707ways to actually do this0:22:25.086 --> 0:22:26.387and you can diy do it0:22:26.407 --> 0:22:27.308yourself you can have0:22:27.348 --> 0:22:28.048someone do it with you0:22:28.069 --> 0:22:29.651we're gonna have some do it0:22:29.671 --> 0:22:31.932diy do it with you dw do it0:22:31.992 --> 0:22:34.796with y and then dfy do it0:22:34.816 --> 0:22:37.817for you all these things uh0:22:38.199 --> 0:22:39.539you know more resources are0:22:39.559 --> 0:22:40.299required if someone does it0:22:40.359 --> 0:22:41.361for you gotta hire someone0:22:41.842 --> 0:22:42.942but it's not a million dollars0:22:43.222 --> 0:22:44.763But I'm going to use real research.0:22:44.784 --> 0:22:45.625I'm going to do the thing.0:22:45.664 --> 0:22:46.806Like, hey, I would say, hey,0:22:46.865 --> 0:22:47.586if you're a researcher,0:22:47.646 --> 0:22:48.426have you written a Twitter0:22:48.468 --> 0:22:49.448thread about your research0:22:49.828 --> 0:22:50.729in language people can0:22:50.749 --> 0:22:51.809understand about the0:22:51.890 --> 0:22:52.911benefits of what you found?0:22:52.931 --> 0:22:53.912And they're like, no.0:22:54.333 --> 0:22:55.012So I'm not just going to say0:22:55.053 --> 0:22:55.634write a Twitter thread.0:22:55.753 --> 0:22:56.855We're going to pick a real0:22:56.875 --> 0:22:57.515paper and I'm going to0:22:57.535 --> 0:22:58.076write a tweet thread.0:22:58.796 --> 0:22:59.797Oh, that's exciting.0:23:00.157 --> 0:23:01.358Tweet three like that.0:23:01.499 --> 0:23:02.559Why I put the link for the0:23:02.599 --> 0:23:04.101full paper at the bottom, not the top.0:23:05.362 --> 0:23:06.122or the bottom and the top.0:23:06.142 --> 0:23:06.442I don't know.0:23:06.922 --> 0:23:09.182I'm using a theme of the matrix.0:23:09.423 --> 0:23:10.343We picked a paper about0:23:10.442 --> 0:23:12.104walking efficiency and stuff like that.0:23:12.423 --> 0:23:13.044And I'm using, it's a,0:23:13.243 --> 0:23:13.804it's going to be done in0:23:13.824 --> 0:23:14.663the tone of Morpheus.0:23:15.625 --> 0:23:15.964Okay.0:23:16.005 --> 0:23:17.244But like how many people are0:23:17.265 --> 0:23:19.486going to know who Morpheus is?0:23:20.526 --> 0:23:20.925Good call.0:23:21.006 --> 0:23:22.105So maybe I'll do a different version too.0:23:23.006 --> 0:23:24.067I like, I mean,0:23:24.366 --> 0:23:25.787some of us here are aged0:23:25.946 --> 0:23:27.167and others are not.0:23:27.448 --> 0:23:28.647You know who Morpheus is?0:23:31.380 --> 0:23:32.000Well, yeah.0:23:32.080 --> 0:23:33.221You and I are the same age.0:23:33.481 --> 0:23:34.021You're the audience.0:23:34.222 --> 0:23:35.483This is researcher to researcher.0:23:35.503 --> 0:23:36.384Okay.0:23:36.785 --> 0:23:37.385And researchers.0:23:40.268 --> 0:23:41.568The Matrix was a dorky movie.0:23:41.910 --> 0:23:42.730I mean, it was a cool movie.0:23:42.750 --> 0:23:44.511I actually wrote a paper on it in college.0:23:47.054 --> 0:23:48.236Thank you for proving me right.0:23:49.616 --> 0:23:50.277Oh, Adam's here.0:23:50.297 --> 0:23:51.298We just had Adam on the show.0:23:51.317 --> 0:23:51.679We do this.0:23:51.699 --> 0:23:52.499Adam!0:23:52.799 --> 0:23:54.060Big reaction reinforces the0:23:54.101 --> 0:23:55.281behavior that we're trying to avoid.0:23:55.301 --> 0:23:56.323The big reaction reinforces.0:23:57.980 --> 0:23:59.301This is like us yelling at dogs.0:23:59.682 --> 0:24:00.383Dogs are barking.0:24:00.423 --> 0:24:01.182So we yell at them.0:24:01.262 --> 0:24:02.064Do you know what dogs do?0:24:02.423 --> 0:24:03.984They hear us barking and they bark back.0:24:04.545 --> 0:24:04.704Right.0:24:04.885 --> 0:24:05.526It's the same way.0:24:05.605 --> 0:24:07.406And humans are humans are0:24:07.426 --> 0:24:08.387the same way we do this as0:24:08.407 --> 0:24:09.409parents to the big reaction0:24:09.429 --> 0:24:10.328reinforces the behavior.0:24:11.230 --> 0:24:12.109Just had Adam on the show.0:24:12.570 --> 0:24:13.530Adam was Adam had some0:24:13.550 --> 0:24:14.311really good insights, too,0:24:14.332 --> 0:24:15.472because he's like, I'm a big dude.0:24:15.873 --> 0:24:16.732So when I communicate to0:24:16.752 --> 0:24:17.614patients and I'm standing0:24:17.634 --> 0:24:18.954in the doorway looming, he's like,0:24:18.974 --> 0:24:19.434I don't do that.0:24:19.674 --> 0:24:20.415I sit down.0:24:20.996 --> 0:24:23.577yeah I do a lot of kneeling0:24:24.117 --> 0:24:25.479actually I do a lot of0:24:25.519 --> 0:24:26.239kneeling at the bedside0:24:26.278 --> 0:24:27.779which anybody who works in0:24:27.799 --> 0:24:28.681the emergency department is0:24:28.701 --> 0:24:32.163like gross but like it it0:24:32.202 --> 0:24:34.084does matter particularly0:24:34.104 --> 0:24:34.804when you're trying not to0:24:34.844 --> 0:24:35.744scare people you know who0:24:35.785 --> 0:24:36.744taught me that without0:24:36.785 --> 0:24:38.125teaching me that and my mom0:24:38.226 --> 0:24:39.807years ago was talking about0:24:39.826 --> 0:24:40.807my nursery school teacher0:24:40.827 --> 0:24:41.528and I'm like I don't really0:24:41.567 --> 0:24:42.709remember then she started0:24:42.788 --> 0:24:43.548saying stuff and I was like0:24:43.608 --> 0:24:45.490I do remember this lady and0:24:45.550 --> 0:24:46.131she's like what do you0:24:46.151 --> 0:24:47.451remember about her and I was like0:24:48.544 --> 0:24:50.184She was like all over the place.0:24:50.545 --> 0:24:51.585And she's like, I'm like,0:24:51.605 --> 0:24:52.565but I don't know what that means.0:24:52.625 --> 0:24:53.105And she goes,0:24:53.605 --> 0:24:56.526your nursery school teacher had CP.0:24:56.766 --> 0:24:57.487And I was like, what?0:24:58.067 --> 0:24:59.926She goes, she wore those crutches.0:25:00.086 --> 0:25:01.748She would use loft strain crutches.0:25:02.307 --> 0:25:03.208So this woman would come0:25:03.228 --> 0:25:04.307into her nursery school and0:25:04.327 --> 0:25:05.048it was always a big,0:25:05.088 --> 0:25:06.148this is back in the day,0:25:06.588 --> 0:25:07.868but it was before everybody did this.0:25:07.950 --> 0:25:08.789There was no shoes allowed0:25:08.809 --> 0:25:09.509in the nursery school.0:25:10.342 --> 0:25:11.242And it was because she0:25:11.303 --> 0:25:12.262crawled around the floor.0:25:12.442 --> 0:25:14.384She was on our level all day.0:25:14.444 --> 0:25:16.586And I remember she was like in your face,0:25:16.665 --> 0:25:17.465like in a good way.0:25:17.946 --> 0:25:18.886Instead of being this woman0:25:18.906 --> 0:25:20.587who was three times my size,0:25:21.028 --> 0:25:22.369she was like on her arm.0:25:22.390 --> 0:25:24.131She was on her elbows like doing this.0:25:24.151 --> 0:25:27.432I don't know who this is.0:25:28.252 --> 0:25:28.973Someone's watching and she0:25:29.013 --> 0:25:29.953says Facebook researchers0:25:29.993 --> 0:25:30.795are so excited to use the0:25:30.815 --> 0:25:32.536big fancy language that the0:25:32.556 --> 0:25:33.355message gets lost.0:25:33.757 --> 0:25:33.936Yes.0:25:35.290 --> 0:25:37.434I'm going to challenge it back.0:25:37.775 --> 0:25:38.375Fourth grade.0:25:38.997 --> 0:25:39.458Fourth grade?0:25:39.498 --> 0:25:39.718Yeah.0:25:39.898 --> 0:25:40.480Fourth grade.0:25:40.700 --> 0:25:42.462Because that is more0:25:43.364 --> 0:25:44.526matching of what like a0:25:44.566 --> 0:25:46.189typical reading level is of0:25:46.308 --> 0:25:47.490adults in the United States.0:25:48.010 --> 0:25:48.311Really?0:25:48.711 --> 0:25:48.972Yes.0:25:51.934 --> 0:25:53.695I think we have to consider0:25:53.816 --> 0:25:55.817it's not always an education thing.0:25:55.836 --> 0:25:57.238Sometimes it's a paying attention.0:25:59.179 --> 0:26:00.058Sometimes it's a paying0:26:00.098 --> 0:26:01.480attention and we need to0:26:01.539 --> 0:26:03.520realize we cannot0:26:03.580 --> 0:26:06.042communicate these science concepts0:26:06.962 --> 0:26:08.144at like what we think is an0:26:08.183 --> 0:26:09.084eighth grade level and0:26:09.124 --> 0:26:12.625expect it to be understood and received.0:26:12.645 --> 0:26:13.625We have so much context.0:26:13.905 --> 0:26:16.086We have so much context.0:26:16.426 --> 0:26:17.347And other people don't.0:26:17.407 --> 0:26:18.647And I think that was a huge0:26:18.807 --> 0:26:21.469issue during the height of the pandemic,0:26:21.548 --> 0:26:21.749right?0:26:21.769 --> 0:26:22.210Was like,0:26:23.130 --> 0:26:24.151do your own research.0:26:24.550 --> 0:26:25.853But like people really, they're not,0:26:26.012 --> 0:26:27.253they're not trained to do that.0:26:27.294 --> 0:26:28.454They're not prepared to do that.0:26:28.494 --> 0:26:29.236They're not prepared to0:26:29.316 --> 0:26:30.436understand research,0:26:30.517 --> 0:26:31.597let alone integrate it and0:26:31.637 --> 0:26:33.538apply it to their specific situation.0:26:34.000 --> 0:26:35.280But also nobody wants to be0:26:35.340 --> 0:26:36.061told what to do.0:26:36.122 --> 0:26:37.623They do want to do their own research,0:26:37.663 --> 0:26:38.523but we need to make it0:26:38.604 --> 0:26:39.585accessible for people.0:26:39.744 --> 0:26:40.786Why do you think researchers0:26:40.846 --> 0:26:41.846are so excited to use big,0:26:41.886 --> 0:26:42.547fancy language?0:26:42.788 --> 0:26:43.708I'll put this out to you and0:26:43.728 --> 0:26:44.689the people watching Casey.0:26:44.729 --> 0:26:45.490Thank you for this comment.0:26:46.170 --> 0:26:47.551It's the same thing Adam just said.0:26:48.685 --> 0:26:49.226It's an emotion.0:26:49.346 --> 0:26:50.526I want people, I feel,0:26:50.665 --> 0:26:51.926I want to make sure I feel0:26:51.946 --> 0:26:52.646like I'm on the level.0:26:52.727 --> 0:26:54.646I want people to think this0:26:54.686 --> 0:26:56.267is an imposter syndrome or0:26:56.307 --> 0:26:57.867making sure people know that I'm smart.0:26:58.548 --> 0:26:59.268So I'm going to use the0:26:59.307 --> 0:27:00.107biggest words possible.0:27:00.347 --> 0:27:01.587This is how my podcast started.0:27:01.988 --> 0:27:03.848I saw someone on stage doing0:27:03.868 --> 0:27:04.528a thing and I'm like,0:27:04.628 --> 0:27:05.449I want to know that.0:27:05.509 --> 0:27:06.288But they were like all0:27:06.348 --> 0:27:07.710buttoned up and using big0:27:07.970 --> 0:27:08.849pontification words.0:27:09.170 --> 0:27:09.930And then I ran into him at a0:27:09.970 --> 0:27:11.789bar 20 minutes later and I0:27:11.829 --> 0:27:12.890understood their 90 minute0:27:12.910 --> 0:27:14.570presentation in 11 and a half minutes.0:27:14.590 --> 0:27:15.471And I was like, boom.0:27:16.050 --> 0:27:17.191where were you where was0:27:17.211 --> 0:27:18.332that dude and he was like0:27:18.352 --> 0:27:19.551well I'm presenting I was0:27:19.571 --> 0:27:20.432like they invited you to0:27:20.471 --> 0:27:21.192present because you're0:27:21.271 --> 0:27:23.432smart and you knew stuff0:27:24.173 --> 0:27:26.232but how you shared it was0:27:26.272 --> 0:27:28.653the failure but society0:27:28.693 --> 0:27:29.554tells us how to act like0:27:29.594 --> 0:27:30.834right now I'm wearing pants0:27:30.854 --> 0:27:31.694you can't see it but0:27:31.795 --> 0:27:32.355society says you're0:27:32.375 --> 0:27:33.154supposed to wear pants0:27:33.194 --> 0:27:34.434right so society tells us0:27:34.454 --> 0:27:35.796what's okay so we watch0:27:35.836 --> 0:27:37.615presenters present and then0:27:37.635 --> 0:27:38.296we're like well that's0:27:38.635 --> 0:27:39.596obviously how I'm supposed0:27:39.615 --> 0:27:41.537to do it so I'm gonna do it like that yes0:27:42.281 --> 0:27:43.123then I meet all these people0:27:43.143 --> 0:27:44.044behind the scenes at bars0:27:44.104 --> 0:27:45.125at csm and I'm like dude0:27:45.144 --> 0:27:45.845you'd be a great presenter0:27:45.865 --> 0:27:46.766and they're like yeah and0:27:46.786 --> 0:27:47.386they get up there and I'm0:27:47.406 --> 0:27:48.267like who the hell was that0:27:49.868 --> 0:27:51.289but I can't stop there I0:27:51.329 --> 0:27:52.932want to show people because0:27:53.392 --> 0:27:54.192and I said this earlier0:27:54.232 --> 0:27:57.395today healthcare I know you0:27:57.476 --> 0:27:58.236feel like you're intel0:27:58.276 --> 0:27:59.597business researchers are0:27:59.617 --> 0:28:00.498just so excited to use the0:28:00.538 --> 0:28:01.799big fancy language and0:28:01.819 --> 0:28:03.240message is lost I know you0:28:03.260 --> 0:28:04.201think you're intel business0:28:05.333 --> 0:28:06.054you're in show business.0:28:06.173 --> 0:28:07.875We just told three stories of failure,0:28:08.335 --> 0:28:08.535right?0:28:08.575 --> 0:28:10.257We told them, but with a story,0:28:10.277 --> 0:28:12.137you get to show them, you get to show it.0:28:12.878 --> 0:28:14.700And that's, I think a key message.0:28:15.721 --> 0:28:15.881Well,0:28:15.921 --> 0:28:17.362I'm going to bring this back to my next,0:28:17.382 --> 0:28:18.823I'm going to bring it back.0:28:19.343 --> 0:28:21.164This is kind of the thing.0:28:21.204 --> 0:28:22.425So in my first job,0:28:23.746 --> 0:28:25.307I wanted that job so badly0:28:25.527 --> 0:28:27.268and I wanted to be the best0:28:27.428 --> 0:28:28.568at it and I wanted to be0:28:28.729 --> 0:28:30.069indispensable and I wanted0:28:30.190 --> 0:28:31.431everybody to be shocked at0:28:31.530 --> 0:28:32.872how good I was at it.0:28:33.612 --> 0:28:36.433That I completely did things0:28:36.493 --> 0:28:37.374the way I thought I was0:28:37.394 --> 0:28:39.035supposed to without0:28:39.075 --> 0:28:41.056understanding why I was supposed to.0:28:41.076 --> 0:28:41.156Yeah.0:28:42.156 --> 0:28:43.597And got tunnel vision.0:28:44.198 --> 0:28:45.699Well, that's how the so-and-so does it.0:28:45.719 --> 0:28:47.098So I'm only going to do it that way.0:28:47.239 --> 0:28:48.460And so I was looking at how0:28:48.500 --> 0:28:49.519I was supposed to do things0:28:49.579 --> 0:28:50.661instead of at the patient0:28:51.040 --> 0:28:52.661for how I needed to be doing things.0:28:53.261 --> 0:28:54.241And then if somebody tried0:28:54.281 --> 0:28:57.403to give me feedback, I was like, no,0:28:57.702 --> 0:28:58.403I've got this.0:28:59.064 --> 0:29:00.284I think I know what I'm doing.0:29:00.625 --> 0:29:01.825And so I totally closed0:29:01.884 --> 0:29:03.405myself off to feedback.0:29:04.346 --> 0:29:06.586And what that ended up in0:29:06.967 --> 0:29:08.208was one of the worst experiences.0:29:09.048 --> 0:29:10.528things anybody has ever said0:29:10.567 --> 0:29:11.288to me since I've been a0:29:11.327 --> 0:29:12.068physical therapist.0:29:12.548 --> 0:29:14.669And I'm glad that I still0:29:14.709 --> 0:29:15.648can look back on it and I0:29:15.689 --> 0:29:16.849can see what I own in that0:29:16.869 --> 0:29:18.029and I can see what they own in that.0:29:18.490 --> 0:29:19.470But the comment that I got0:29:19.509 --> 0:29:23.030in my first job was, maybe somewhere,0:29:23.250 --> 0:29:23.871someday,0:29:24.191 --> 0:29:26.010you'll be a good physical therapist.0:29:27.731 --> 0:29:29.592And I still have imposter0:29:29.612 --> 0:29:30.412syndrome from that.0:29:30.511 --> 0:29:31.872I still carry that with me.0:29:32.073 --> 0:29:34.133But I can see from the way I was0:29:35.390 --> 0:29:37.330behaving that I had failed.0:29:37.371 --> 0:29:38.692I was failing my patients.0:29:38.932 --> 0:29:40.432I was failing myself.0:29:40.952 --> 0:29:42.273And I had such a fixed0:29:42.354 --> 0:29:43.855mindset that I couldn't let0:29:43.974 --> 0:29:45.115in any of that feedback.0:29:45.576 --> 0:29:47.376I couldn't, I couldn't learn.0:29:47.396 --> 0:29:48.917I like literally could not0:29:48.978 --> 0:29:51.519learn because when you're trying to copy,0:29:51.559 --> 0:29:52.400you can't fail.0:29:52.980 --> 0:29:53.201Right.0:29:53.500 --> 0:29:54.161And I was like,0:29:54.401 --> 0:29:56.082so afraid of being found0:29:56.221 --> 0:29:57.923out for being a fraud when0:29:57.982 --> 0:29:59.683in fact I was because I was0:29:59.784 --> 0:30:02.006like not serving my0:30:02.046 --> 0:30:02.965patients in the way they0:30:03.006 --> 0:30:03.926needed to be served.0:30:04.431 --> 0:30:05.614This is the Easter ham story.0:30:05.634 --> 0:30:06.797You guys know the Easter ham story?0:30:06.817 --> 0:30:07.878Well, no, but I cannot wait.0:30:08.461 --> 0:30:10.221All right, so a mother and daughter,0:30:10.481 --> 0:30:10.722right?0:30:10.762 --> 0:30:12.702Mother and 10-year-old daughter.0:30:12.823 --> 0:30:14.282Every year, the mother has Easter.0:30:15.163 --> 0:30:16.443And the daughter sits there0:30:16.463 --> 0:30:17.584at the kitchen island and0:30:17.624 --> 0:30:19.384watches mom prepare the ham.0:30:19.423 --> 0:30:21.025And she does the basting and0:30:21.105 --> 0:30:22.724she puts pineapple things.0:30:22.785 --> 0:30:23.565I don't know, all the things.0:30:23.585 --> 0:30:24.806She cuts the ham in half and0:30:24.846 --> 0:30:25.705does the basting and0:30:25.826 --> 0:30:27.405prepares it and does all the thing,0:30:27.486 --> 0:30:28.246puts it in the oven,0:30:28.286 --> 0:30:29.426does it the same way every0:30:29.467 --> 0:30:31.247single year until the girl0:30:31.267 --> 0:30:32.346eventually becomes a woman0:30:32.666 --> 0:30:33.548and she gets married and0:30:33.567 --> 0:30:34.788she has a house and now she0:30:34.847 --> 0:30:35.327is going to host0:30:35.907 --> 0:30:36.907Easter dinner and she can't0:30:36.948 --> 0:30:37.867wait to show mom.0:30:38.407 --> 0:30:38.868I did this.0:30:39.048 --> 0:30:39.509I'm, you know,0:30:39.648 --> 0:30:40.469I'm going to do it like you.0:30:41.009 --> 0:30:41.588Mom comes.0:30:41.648 --> 0:30:42.548Now it's the reversal.0:30:42.709 --> 0:30:43.729Mom is sitting at the island0:30:43.769 --> 0:30:45.230watching the daughter prepare everything.0:30:45.250 --> 0:30:46.029And she does this and this0:30:46.089 --> 0:30:46.809and this and this and this.0:30:47.690 --> 0:30:48.509And she does it.0:30:49.029 --> 0:30:50.830She puts the pineapples and0:30:50.851 --> 0:30:51.971she cuts the ham and she base it,0:30:52.050 --> 0:30:53.351puts it in, takes it out.0:30:54.131 --> 0:30:54.730Now's the moment.0:30:55.010 --> 0:30:56.050Mom's going to it's going to0:30:56.070 --> 0:30:57.672sample the ham and she0:30:57.711 --> 0:30:58.571takes a bite and she goes,0:30:58.592 --> 0:30:59.751it's fantastic.0:30:59.832 --> 0:31:00.352It's amazing.0:31:00.971 --> 0:31:01.531You know, she's like,0:31:01.571 --> 0:31:02.932I paid attention to you all those years.0:31:02.992 --> 0:31:05.012She goes, Mom goes, but I have a question.0:31:06.060 --> 0:31:06.320Okay.0:31:07.621 --> 0:31:09.122You took the pineapples on there.0:31:09.142 --> 0:31:09.741You put them in there.0:31:09.781 --> 0:31:10.021Yep.0:31:10.221 --> 0:31:10.902Then you basted it.0:31:11.041 --> 0:31:12.702You cut the ham in half.0:31:13.663 --> 0:31:14.663Why do you cut the ham in half?0:31:15.824 --> 0:31:17.483You did that every year.0:31:18.144 --> 0:31:18.304Yeah,0:31:18.344 --> 0:31:19.664we lived in an apartment in Brooklyn.0:31:19.805 --> 0:31:20.944Our oven was this big.0:31:21.065 --> 0:31:22.806I could not put the ham in0:31:22.826 --> 0:31:23.965the oven if it was whole.0:31:24.346 --> 0:31:26.646I cut it in half because it did not fit.0:31:27.086 --> 0:31:27.886You live in the Burbs.0:31:27.906 --> 0:31:28.826You got a huge oven.0:31:28.926 --> 0:31:29.827Why do you cut the ham in half?0:31:30.307 --> 0:31:31.048She cut it in half because0:31:31.887 --> 0:31:32.867she never questioned why0:31:32.887 --> 0:31:33.648she cut the ham in half.0:31:33.669 --> 0:31:34.769She tried to cut it in half.0:31:35.898 --> 0:31:36.038Well,0:31:36.058 --> 0:31:39.384it's just a story of like healthy0:31:39.423 --> 0:31:39.864questioning.0:31:39.903 --> 0:31:40.805I think questioning0:31:40.845 --> 0:31:42.508sometimes is seen as a bad thing.0:31:43.749 --> 0:31:44.390People look at me.0:31:44.410 --> 0:31:45.431I go into, you know,0:31:45.551 --> 0:31:46.712communication evaluation0:31:46.732 --> 0:31:47.653meetings or branding0:31:47.673 --> 0:31:48.434meetings and people like0:31:48.695 --> 0:31:49.477they think they're just0:31:49.497 --> 0:31:49.997going to tell me what0:31:50.017 --> 0:31:50.657happens and come out.0:31:50.698 --> 0:31:52.480I go, I'm here to ask a ton of questions.0:31:53.365 --> 0:31:54.226they are not threatening.0:31:54.506 --> 0:31:55.948I need, help me understand.0:31:56.008 --> 0:31:56.608It's a great pre,0:31:56.709 --> 0:31:58.289I think I talked about that with Adam.0:31:58.851 --> 0:31:59.672Help me understand is a0:31:59.751 --> 0:32:01.114great prefix to anything.0:32:01.473 --> 0:32:02.414But I think we don't do0:32:02.454 --> 0:32:03.957enough healthy questioning.0:32:04.017 --> 0:32:05.057I also think it's because we0:32:05.097 --> 0:32:07.319do it on social platforms0:32:07.780 --> 0:32:09.182and there's no depth there0:32:09.663 --> 0:32:11.265and it can come across a certain way.0:32:11.904 --> 0:32:13.006And that's where I think that book0:32:13.991 --> 0:32:14.751never split the difference0:32:14.833 --> 0:32:16.153helps because all that guy0:32:16.173 --> 0:32:17.233was a hostage negotiator.0:32:17.294 --> 0:32:18.513All he had was questions on0:32:18.534 --> 0:32:19.634a phone with someone who0:32:19.654 --> 0:32:20.234was in a high stakes0:32:20.255 --> 0:32:21.435situation who probably did more.0:32:22.256 --> 0:32:24.196But the ham story is an example of that.0:32:24.517 --> 0:32:25.176I did the same thing.0:32:25.217 --> 0:32:27.577So my second failure comes from radio.0:32:28.239 --> 0:32:29.598It was the same as the ham story.0:32:30.400 --> 0:32:31.720I came to a radio station as0:32:31.759 --> 0:32:32.681like the number two guy0:32:32.740 --> 0:32:33.580came to a new state.0:32:33.961 --> 0:32:35.382And I worked under this guy, Chris Lloyd,0:32:35.582 --> 0:32:37.002great boss, great boss.0:32:37.883 --> 0:32:38.584And I learned from him.0:32:38.743 --> 0:32:40.364And I did exactly what he was doing.0:32:40.403 --> 0:32:41.545And he was a couple years older than me.0:32:41.565 --> 0:32:42.826And he'd been at that station for a while.0:32:42.885 --> 0:32:43.326And I was like,0:32:44.221 --> 0:32:46.490training to do his job,0:32:46.732 --> 0:32:47.435either at another radio0:32:47.455 --> 0:32:48.661station or when he moved on.0:32:49.275 --> 0:32:50.615Two years in, he goes and moves on.0:32:50.955 --> 0:32:51.955And now I have a two-month0:32:52.017 --> 0:32:52.797job opportunity.0:32:53.176 --> 0:32:54.057While the radio station0:32:54.097 --> 0:32:55.999company is looking for a replacement,0:32:56.459 --> 0:32:57.259they should not have hired0:32:57.278 --> 0:32:58.980a 24-year-old me to do this.0:32:59.279 --> 0:33:00.401And I had two months to run0:33:00.421 --> 0:33:01.442the station in the interim.0:33:02.041 --> 0:33:03.903So I went and just did0:33:04.123 --> 0:33:05.243everything Chris did for0:33:05.263 --> 0:33:06.104those two months or the0:33:06.403 --> 0:33:07.164first couple weeks.0:33:07.744 --> 0:33:08.644I slept on my couch.0:33:09.026 --> 0:33:09.726I never slept.0:33:09.746 --> 0:33:11.366I had GI issues because I0:33:11.406 --> 0:33:14.167was so focused on... Every0:33:14.228 --> 0:33:14.769question was...0:33:15.608 --> 0:33:16.409how did Chris do this?0:33:16.429 --> 0:33:17.130What would Chris do?0:33:17.250 --> 0:33:18.651How would Chris, this is a new situation.0:33:18.691 --> 0:33:19.451How would Chris answer?0:33:19.951 --> 0:33:20.632I would call him.0:33:20.751 --> 0:33:21.271You imagine this.0:33:21.291 --> 0:33:22.352I'm like a 24 year old kid0:33:22.393 --> 0:33:23.313calling a 30 year old man0:33:23.353 --> 0:33:24.493who does not work for your0:33:24.534 --> 0:33:25.094company anymore.0:33:25.433 --> 0:33:25.814And he took it.0:33:26.094 --> 0:33:27.255And I'm like, Chris, what do you,0:33:27.275 --> 0:33:28.496what do you, what do you,0:33:28.516 --> 0:33:29.256what should I do here?0:33:29.276 --> 0:33:29.915Here's the situation.0:33:29.935 --> 0:33:30.277What do I do?0:33:30.297 --> 0:33:30.616What do I do?0:33:30.656 --> 0:33:33.097And he's like, he finally was like, dude,0:33:33.557 --> 0:33:34.538they put you in charge of a0:33:34.638 --> 0:33:35.739five plus million dollar0:33:35.759 --> 0:33:36.779radio station while I'm gone.0:33:36.819 --> 0:33:37.680It's not by accident.0:33:38.000 --> 0:33:38.701Imposter syndrome.0:33:39.304 --> 0:33:39.683And he's like,0:33:39.983 --> 0:33:42.006you can't for some stuff for a while.0:33:42.026 --> 0:33:42.645You're going to be able to0:33:42.665 --> 0:33:43.705photocopy what I did.0:33:44.267 --> 0:33:45.346But life, everything moves.0:33:46.048 --> 0:33:48.568So if you were my number two,0:33:48.749 --> 0:33:49.809if you were my music0:33:49.829 --> 0:33:51.830director there and I was still there,0:33:52.171 --> 0:33:53.872what would you tell me to think about?0:33:53.991 --> 0:33:54.771What would you tell me to do?0:33:54.893 --> 0:33:55.232I was like,0:33:55.252 --> 0:33:55.952I tell you to do this and this.0:33:56.993 --> 0:33:57.173Great.0:33:57.213 --> 0:33:57.433Do that.0:33:58.856 --> 0:33:59.438And I was like, great.0:33:59.498 --> 0:34:00.397So don't keep the ham in0:34:00.438 --> 0:34:01.138half just because Chris0:34:01.199 --> 0:34:02.099used to cut the ham in half.0:34:02.920 --> 0:34:04.842Ask, what are we facing here?0:34:05.403 --> 0:34:06.423And I think that's how you lead.0:34:07.243 --> 0:34:08.364That was the biggest lesson.0:34:08.445 --> 0:34:09.505And I started sleeping again.0:34:09.525 --> 0:34:10.567My GI issues went away.0:34:10.626 --> 0:34:11.367My stress level went down.0:34:11.387 --> 0:34:12.748I started liking what I was doing.0:34:13.630 --> 0:34:14.309And that's important.0:34:14.409 --> 0:34:15.811That was sort of a parallel0:34:15.831 --> 0:34:16.771to what you were talking about,0:34:16.811 --> 0:34:18.414where you were trying to be everything.0:34:18.454 --> 0:34:18.954You can't.0:34:19.134 --> 0:34:19.614Newsflash.0:34:19.655 --> 0:34:20.155You can't.0:34:20.235 --> 0:34:20.755Don't try.0:34:20.856 --> 0:34:21.436But you will.0:34:21.755 --> 0:34:22.297Then you'll fail.0:34:22.317 --> 0:34:22.516And0:34:22.657 --> 0:34:23.277I was trying to cook0:34:23.356 --> 0:34:24.677everything like the ham too.0:34:24.717 --> 0:34:26.438It didn't matter if it was pasta or not.0:34:26.458 --> 0:34:27.858I was putting the pineapples on it.0:34:28.018 --> 0:34:29.599I was putting it in the oven.0:34:30.039 --> 0:34:33.000Like it, like it just didn't work.0:34:33.139 --> 0:34:34.621And so if you're a student0:34:34.661 --> 0:34:35.860PT and you're hearing this,0:34:35.920 --> 0:34:38.461like you've got to find your own way.0:34:38.541 --> 0:34:39.541You have the tools,0:34:39.561 --> 0:34:40.983but you need to be the one0:34:41.003 --> 0:34:41.782that uses them.0:34:42.523 --> 0:34:43.423And it's more about the0:34:43.443 --> 0:34:44.643patient than how other0:34:44.664 --> 0:34:46.043people are practicing.0:34:46.063 --> 0:34:48.724So that was my.0:34:49.164 --> 0:34:50.565Elise, what's your second failure?0:34:50.585 --> 0:34:51.025Do you have one?0:34:51.590 --> 0:34:51.909Man,0:34:52.030 --> 0:34:53.072so we're going to bring it back0:34:53.172 --> 0:34:54.092actually to the ethics0:34:54.132 --> 0:34:55.373question that we were like,0:34:55.653 --> 0:34:57.635let's get her on the podcast because yes.0:34:59.077 --> 0:35:01.519So mine kind of goes along0:35:01.559 --> 0:35:02.902with the theme of healthy questioning.0:35:03.061 --> 0:35:04.202I really should have done0:35:04.322 --> 0:35:06.344more of this and kind of0:35:06.405 --> 0:35:08.306that pause to stop and just0:35:09.784 --> 0:35:10.864look at what's happening0:35:10.905 --> 0:35:12.867around me so I took my0:35:12.947 --> 0:35:14.909dream job as my first job0:35:14.949 --> 0:35:15.909out of physical therapy0:35:15.929 --> 0:35:18.311school it was exactly what0:35:18.351 --> 0:35:20.753I wanted it to be until it0:35:20.835 --> 0:35:22.516wasn't and I really can't0:35:22.556 --> 0:35:23.737say like I woke up one day0:35:23.777 --> 0:35:24.838it was a nightmare because0:35:24.918 --> 0:35:26.599it really was a gradual0:35:26.659 --> 0:35:28.641wearing down over time and0:35:28.681 --> 0:35:29.742my first indication was0:35:29.802 --> 0:35:30.804actually the first day of0:35:30.864 --> 0:35:32.626work I was being oriented to the space0:35:33.246 --> 0:35:34.027Long story short,0:35:34.067 --> 0:35:37.230we were inside of an office0:35:37.309 --> 0:35:39.632building where we were leasing the space.0:35:40.132 --> 0:35:41.054And so we didn't have a lot0:35:41.094 --> 0:35:42.655of ability to change things.0:35:42.695 --> 0:35:43.777We were borrowing space.0:35:44.818 --> 0:35:45.518And because of that,0:35:45.559 --> 0:35:45.978because of the0:35:46.059 --> 0:35:50.282organizational structure and the bodies,0:35:50.362 --> 0:35:51.804the powers that be that do the...0:35:54.195 --> 0:35:54.896Oh, what's the word?0:35:55.036 --> 0:35:56.056Like quality checks,0:35:56.117 --> 0:35:56.916making sure you're doing0:35:56.936 --> 0:35:58.759what you're doing or doing0:35:59.018 --> 0:36:00.599you're supposed to be doing.0:36:01.940 --> 0:36:03.041Instead of having a private0:36:03.061 --> 0:36:03.722room where I could treat0:36:03.742 --> 0:36:04.643patients all by myself,0:36:04.684 --> 0:36:05.623we were sharing that space0:36:05.724 --> 0:36:07.726and that goes against regulations.0:36:07.985 --> 0:36:10.148And my boss at the time said,0:36:10.869 --> 0:36:12.369when this body comes and0:36:12.409 --> 0:36:13.351does their inspection,0:36:13.391 --> 0:36:14.451that's the word I'm looking for.0:36:15.032 --> 0:36:17.514Just tell them we don't have a space.0:36:17.713 --> 0:36:18.534We use this.0:36:19.235 --> 0:36:20.556And so that asking is,0:36:21.577 --> 0:36:23.018of me to lie on the very0:36:23.097 --> 0:36:24.378first day should have been0:36:24.438 --> 0:36:28.541the leave the red flags0:36:29.061 --> 0:36:30.143right like it was the0:36:30.222 --> 0:36:31.704reddest of red flags and I0:36:31.764 --> 0:36:34.907was so desperate like hey I0:36:34.967 --> 0:36:36.126thought this was my dream0:36:36.166 --> 0:36:38.369job and it was until it0:36:38.409 --> 0:36:41.710wasn't but also this was0:36:41.811 --> 0:36:43.373such a powerful lesson for0:36:43.432 --> 0:36:45.534me in boundaries and0:36:45.733 --> 0:36:48.295setting boundaries and I0:36:48.356 --> 0:36:50.538remember even my ci told me this0:36:51.237 --> 0:36:52.739like as if she I think she0:36:52.838 --> 0:36:53.818knew me because she knew0:36:53.858 --> 0:36:54.440that I was going to0:36:54.500 --> 0:36:55.360experience this at some0:36:55.440 --> 0:36:56.981point she was like if you0:36:57.041 --> 0:36:59.001give them a step they will0:36:59.041 --> 0:37:01.702take three and she was so0:37:02.083 --> 0:37:03.443so right and the rest of0:37:03.483 --> 0:37:04.425the time that I was there0:37:04.525 --> 0:37:07.186two years every week was a0:37:07.346 --> 0:37:09.226step in pushing what I was0:37:09.327 --> 0:37:10.307comfortable with and what I0:37:10.347 --> 0:37:11.527was willing to put up with0:37:12.108 --> 0:37:12.889because they knew0:37:13.009 --> 0:37:14.809ultimately like I was there0:37:14.849 --> 0:37:15.710to help patients0:37:16.530 --> 0:37:18.612And like that is absolutely0:37:18.632 --> 0:37:19.992what I was put on this earth to do.0:37:20.052 --> 0:37:21.172And I have such like I wear0:37:21.233 --> 0:37:22.793my heart on my sleeve in that capacity.0:37:23.532 --> 0:37:25.253And some people know that0:37:25.373 --> 0:37:26.373and they will try to take0:37:26.414 --> 0:37:27.275advantage of that.0:37:27.414 --> 0:37:29.315And so it sucked.0:37:29.454 --> 0:37:30.476It was two years of hell.0:37:30.596 --> 0:37:31.635It was another year of hell0:37:31.775 --> 0:37:33.597after I left because I was0:37:34.257 --> 0:37:35.898like I was coping and0:37:35.958 --> 0:37:37.717trying to bounce back from that.0:37:38.338 --> 0:37:39.759But now it's an opportunity0:37:39.818 --> 0:37:41.940that I literally have had0:37:42.420 --> 0:37:43.840three different therapists0:37:43.900 --> 0:37:45.280who took the job after me.0:37:46.240 --> 0:37:47.402After they took the job,0:37:47.481 --> 0:37:50.143they found me and asked me about things.0:37:50.242 --> 0:37:51.903And I can share that experience with them.0:37:52.023 --> 0:37:53.324And I can share now all0:37:53.344 --> 0:37:54.304three of them have left.0:37:55.226 --> 0:37:56.806Nope, not an accident.0:37:56.826 --> 0:37:58.387And I think that's part of0:37:58.467 --> 0:37:59.907my journey is I can now0:38:00.068 --> 0:38:01.668share that experience with0:38:01.768 --> 0:38:02.708other therapists.0:38:03.389 --> 0:38:04.190And ideally, like,0:38:04.789 --> 0:38:05.811this is what I've learned0:38:05.851 --> 0:38:08.152how not to do and how not to practice.0:38:08.431 --> 0:38:09.592I hope you will take that0:38:09.693 --> 0:38:11.474and have a better launching0:38:11.514 --> 0:38:12.673pad in your own career by0:38:12.733 --> 0:38:14.135not making those same mistakes I did.0:38:14.461 --> 0:38:15.181That's why when Rebecca0:38:15.202 --> 0:38:16.563brought this topic up today, I was like,0:38:16.623 --> 0:38:16.902yeah,0:38:17.344 --> 0:38:19.485because failure teaches us more than0:38:19.505 --> 0:38:20.085success does.0:38:20.105 --> 0:38:20.985What are we going to say, Rebecca?0:38:21.385 --> 0:38:22.786Well, Jimmy, you asked a question, I think,0:38:22.847 --> 0:38:24.307on Facebook maybe last week,0:38:24.347 --> 0:38:24.807and it was like,0:38:24.847 --> 0:38:26.588what advice would you give a new grad?0:38:26.608 --> 0:38:29.170And my comment that I think0:38:29.190 --> 0:38:30.610applies to both of us, at least,0:38:30.751 --> 0:38:32.813is the first job may not be the job.0:38:32.833 --> 0:38:35.313And it probably isn't.0:38:35.434 --> 0:38:36.974And even if it's the dream job,0:38:37.014 --> 0:38:38.715it still might not be the job.0:38:38.795 --> 0:38:40.336And it's OK for that because0:38:40.356 --> 0:38:42.077I thought I had my dream job.0:38:42.637 --> 0:38:44.280You thought you had your dream job.0:38:44.679 --> 0:38:45.501Both of us learned in0:38:45.541 --> 0:38:46.402different ways that that0:38:46.442 --> 0:38:47.302was not the case.0:38:47.481 --> 0:38:48.623And then I went on to be0:38:49.123 --> 0:38:50.065hopefully a good physical0:38:50.105 --> 0:38:51.085therapist somewhere else0:38:51.346 --> 0:38:52.126after that comment.0:38:52.166 --> 0:38:54.327But I think that's a mistake0:38:54.407 --> 0:38:56.050that we get into, too,0:38:56.190 --> 0:38:57.130is we've convinced0:38:57.190 --> 0:38:58.351ourselves that something is0:38:58.431 --> 0:39:00.092perfect and we can we can0:39:00.152 --> 0:39:02.034turn a blind eye to so much.0:39:02.574 --> 0:39:03.056Right.0:39:03.576 --> 0:39:05.137To prove to ourselves we0:39:05.157 --> 0:39:07.016made the right choice until0:39:07.036 --> 0:39:08.038we can't anymore.0:39:08.237 --> 0:39:09.538And then what?0:39:09.657 --> 0:39:11.679This happens in abusive relationships,0:39:11.998 --> 0:39:12.119right?0:39:12.358 --> 0:39:13.880Call it enabling, right?0:39:13.920 --> 0:39:14.800You become enabling.0:39:14.820 --> 0:39:15.380You're like, well,0:39:15.800 --> 0:39:17.460this is the lobster in a pot, right?0:39:18.001 --> 0:39:20.402Two ways you boil a lobster is, number one,0:39:20.442 --> 0:39:21.342you get a big old pot,0:39:21.442 --> 0:39:22.382you start boiling the water,0:39:22.402 --> 0:39:23.443and you throw the lobster in.0:39:23.503 --> 0:39:24.342Trust me, the lobster knows.0:39:25.043 --> 0:39:26.043I've talked to lobsters.0:39:26.264 --> 0:39:26.523They know.0:39:27.914 --> 0:39:28.835The other way is you put a0:39:28.876 --> 0:39:30.438lobster in a pot, lukewarm water.0:39:30.858 --> 0:39:31.760Lobsters are like, that's cool.0:39:31.780 --> 0:39:32.181I like water.0:39:32.340 --> 0:39:33.382And then you slowly and you0:39:33.402 --> 0:39:34.083start heating it up.0:39:34.103 --> 0:39:34.664It doesn't notice.0:39:35.324 --> 0:39:36.286That's what people who are0:39:36.346 --> 0:39:37.547asking you to break the rules do.0:39:38.248 --> 0:39:40.170They wouldn't come and be like, Elise,0:39:40.231 --> 0:39:41.914today we're going to commit murder.0:39:41.994 --> 0:39:43.155You'd be like, no, too much.0:39:45.494 --> 0:39:46.474What they did was they were like,0:39:46.494 --> 0:39:47.496we're just going to do this0:39:48.076 --> 0:39:48.596and that's it.0:39:48.836 --> 0:39:49.336And you're like that.0:39:49.456 --> 0:39:51.197All right.0:39:51.418 --> 0:39:52.199Well, I mean,0:39:52.278 --> 0:39:53.739I guess you think I really0:39:53.780 --> 0:39:55.101like the frog example.0:39:55.161 --> 0:39:56.541So it's similar to the lobster.0:39:56.621 --> 0:39:57.641So if you put a frog,0:39:57.782 --> 0:39:58.802if you take a frog and drop0:39:58.822 --> 0:39:59.623them in boiling water,0:39:59.643 --> 0:40:00.643they will jump out.0:40:01.085 --> 0:40:01.264Right.0:40:02.025 --> 0:40:03.826But the frog will not jump0:40:03.985 --> 0:40:05.067out if you slowly0:40:05.186 --> 0:40:06.568incrementally turn up that0:40:06.608 --> 0:40:08.170water until it's boiling.0:40:08.309 --> 0:40:09.650And I do think that as0:40:09.851 --> 0:40:11.132especially as a new grad0:40:11.572 --> 0:40:12.233and now that I've been0:40:12.273 --> 0:40:13.353practicing for five years,0:40:13.393 --> 0:40:14.514I have a lot of lessons0:40:14.574 --> 0:40:16.335learned and a lot more to learn still.0:40:16.876 --> 0:40:18.958But I do think that is that.0:40:20.432 --> 0:40:23.034imagery for me I was the0:40:23.114 --> 0:40:24.835frog in the slowly0:40:24.956 --> 0:40:26.918increasing temperature and0:40:26.998 --> 0:40:29.719it was not until I was at0:40:29.840 --> 0:40:31.721boiling that I finally saw0:40:32.021 --> 0:40:33.342oh I need to jump out0:40:33.362 --> 0:40:34.782that's okay yeah I sat in0:40:34.822 --> 0:40:36.023it for years that's okay0:40:36.043 --> 0:40:37.045for them the people asking0:40:37.065 --> 0:40:37.565you to do that because0:40:37.585 --> 0:40:38.146they'll just find another0:40:38.166 --> 0:40:40.206frog exactly and they did0:40:40.266 --> 0:40:41.268they found three more frogs0:40:41.507 --> 0:40:42.248I think frogs better0:40:42.268 --> 0:40:43.590because lobsters don't jump0:40:43.610 --> 0:40:44.530very well so I think from0:40:44.610 --> 0:40:45.210now on I'm going to tell0:40:45.251 --> 0:40:46.170that story because like0:40:46.271 --> 0:40:47.311lobsters are just like what0:40:47.331 --> 0:40:48.233do I do I don't know what to do0:40:48.655 --> 0:40:49.916What I got to know though, really,0:40:49.956 --> 0:40:50.596is are there going to be0:40:50.615 --> 0:40:51.777like recipes in the show notes?0:40:51.817 --> 0:40:52.717Cause now you've told us,0:40:52.757 --> 0:40:53.978taught us how to cook a ham0:40:54.018 --> 0:40:55.858and how to cook a lobster.0:40:55.878 --> 0:40:56.880I think we need to have like0:40:57.139 --> 0:40:58.780Pinterest links to the recipes for this.0:40:59.001 --> 0:41:00.201Weirdest food you've ever eaten.0:41:01.661 --> 0:41:03.202Oh, an alligator.0:41:03.222 --> 0:41:04.143I've had ostrich.0:41:05.831 --> 0:41:07.152These were never, I never ordered them.0:41:07.172 --> 0:41:07.873It was always someone0:41:07.972 --> 0:41:08.793ordered it and they were like,0:41:08.813 --> 0:41:09.474do you want to try this?0:41:09.494 --> 0:41:10.094I'm like, I guess.0:41:10.114 --> 0:41:10.996That's just Cajun food.0:41:11.797 --> 0:41:14.159I had a cheese fried worm at0:41:14.259 --> 0:41:15.539science camp one summer.0:41:15.559 --> 0:41:18.342Nope.0:41:18.382 --> 0:41:18.583Nope.0:41:19.824 --> 0:41:20.605This is kind of boring,0:41:20.664 --> 0:41:22.485but every time I say this to somebody,0:41:22.545 --> 0:41:23.706they are like super grossed out.0:41:23.726 --> 0:41:24.367So when I was a kid,0:41:24.387 --> 0:41:25.588I was really allergic to milk.0:41:25.648 --> 0:41:26.670And so I used to eat orange0:41:26.690 --> 0:41:27.590juice on my cereal.0:41:28.192 --> 0:41:30.072So I need you to imagine like.0:41:30.594 --> 0:41:30.693No.0:41:32.034 --> 0:41:33.833it yeah and then like do you0:41:33.873 --> 0:41:34.914brush your teeth before do0:41:34.974 --> 0:41:35.875you brush your teeth after0:41:35.934 --> 0:41:37.735it's like so it's gross0:41:37.775 --> 0:41:40.076either way um yeah orange0:41:40.115 --> 0:41:41.135juice and cereal but I have0:41:41.155 --> 0:41:42.056to tell you every once in a0:41:42.076 --> 0:41:43.036while like as a comfort0:41:43.056 --> 0:41:44.617thing I still I still do it0:41:47.677 --> 0:41:48.757and that makes me happy0:41:48.777 --> 0:41:49.777that's the weirdest thing0:41:50.077 --> 0:41:51.538I've heard in a long time0:41:51.597 --> 0:41:53.059okay it's not a cheese0:41:53.079 --> 0:41:54.838fried worm I can't keep up with that0:41:55.373 --> 0:41:56.693Both cheese and worms are0:41:56.713 --> 0:41:57.934food and orange juice0:41:58.474 --> 0:42:00.715soaking in corn flakes or lucky charms.0:42:01.394 --> 0:42:02.594That's a lot of ass.0:42:02.614 --> 0:42:03.094Grape nuts.0:42:04.235 --> 0:42:04.476What?0:42:04.516 --> 0:42:06.597Grape nuts.0:42:07.056 --> 0:42:07.456So you were like,0:42:07.476 --> 0:42:08.277let me pour some orange0:42:08.317 --> 0:42:09.398juice on some gravel.0:42:09.557 --> 0:42:10.418That's what grape nuts are.0:42:11.177 --> 0:42:13.378And then chew for 35 minutes.0:42:13.739 --> 0:42:13.958Yeah.0:42:14.259 --> 0:42:14.498Great.0:42:14.539 --> 0:42:15.760When you get these masseter muscles.0:42:15.840 --> 0:42:16.039All right.0:42:16.599 --> 0:42:16.679Uh,0:42:16.719 --> 0:42:17.679let's wrap this thing up with the0:42:17.699 --> 0:42:18.219parting shot.0:42:18.239 --> 0:42:18.519What would you,0:42:18.639 --> 0:42:19.840how would you sum up any0:42:19.880 --> 0:42:21.141part of this with the audience?0:42:21.161 --> 0:42:22.101At least what would your0:42:22.342 --> 0:42:23.202parting shot be for today?0:42:24.588 --> 0:42:25.248Well, first of all,0:42:25.268 --> 0:42:26.148I think you need to read0:42:26.188 --> 0:42:27.210the ethics section in the0:42:27.269 --> 0:42:29.150APTA magazine because that- This month?0:42:29.670 --> 0:42:30.210Is it a good one?0:42:30.751 --> 0:42:31.891I haven't read it yet, but I mean,0:42:31.931 --> 0:42:33.733just in general, I read it every month.0:42:33.873 --> 0:42:36.295And I feel like the ethical0:42:36.335 --> 0:42:37.514situations that we talked0:42:37.534 --> 0:42:38.755about in PT school were so0:42:38.815 --> 0:42:39.396black and white.0:42:39.757 --> 0:42:39.956Yes.0:42:40.577 --> 0:42:42.297In the real world, in practice,0:42:42.498 --> 0:42:43.278it is gray.0:42:43.659 --> 0:42:45.000And I think you need to be0:42:45.099 --> 0:42:46.079abundantly clear.0:42:46.159 --> 0:42:47.161And this comes with practice.0:42:47.201 --> 0:42:47.880It comes with time.0:42:48.422 --> 0:42:49.722But be abundantly clear on0:42:49.782 --> 0:42:50.862where your lines are.0:42:51.023 --> 0:42:52.304And when those lines are crossed-0:42:53.226 --> 0:42:53.826Walk away.0:42:53.846 --> 0:42:56.188Yeah.0:42:56.228 --> 0:42:56.949Everything out in the real0:42:56.969 --> 0:42:58.969world is peri-aqueductal gray.0:42:59.010 --> 0:43:00.110That is the official color0:43:00.490 --> 0:43:01.572of ethical issues we0:43:01.592 --> 0:43:02.672discussed on a previous episode.0:43:02.693 --> 0:43:03.313I can't remember what it is,0:43:03.333 --> 0:43:04.233but that's the official color.0:43:04.833 --> 0:43:06.014Parting shot, Rebecca Griffith.0:43:07.144 --> 0:43:08.766I think like failure is free,0:43:08.945 --> 0:43:10.246but like learning from it0:43:10.327 --> 0:43:11.126and growing from it is0:43:11.186 --> 0:43:13.007costly where it can be,0:43:13.608 --> 0:43:16.130but that it's worth that0:43:16.329 --> 0:43:18.110cost to be better.0:43:18.210 --> 0:43:18.911And to learn from that,0:43:18.951 --> 0:43:19.851because I think if both0:43:19.931 --> 0:43:21.072Elise and I had stayed0:43:21.192 --> 0:43:22.333being the way we were in0:43:22.353 --> 0:43:23.072the places we were,0:43:23.134 --> 0:43:24.514we wouldn't be who we are now.0:43:25.014 --> 0:43:26.135And I would probably still0:43:26.175 --> 0:43:27.795be like hiding in the bathroom at work.0:43:27.916 --> 0:43:31.358So you gotta, you gotta put in the cost.0:43:31.777 --> 0:43:33.818I had a Twitter interaction with some guy.0:43:33.938 --> 0:43:34.498I can't remember who.0:43:34.639 --> 0:43:35.518Did you know Nick Hoops?0:43:35.980 --> 0:43:36.400Nick Hoops.0:43:37.280 --> 0:43:38.601He said something about failure.0:43:39.081 --> 0:43:39.880And then someone was like,0:43:40.681 --> 0:43:41.862I don't know why you love failure.0:43:41.981 --> 0:43:43.202I'm over here loving success.0:43:43.483 --> 0:43:43.802And I was like,0:43:43.822 --> 0:43:44.862I'm going to agree with Nick on this one.0:43:44.882 --> 0:43:45.663He's like, well,0:43:45.963 --> 0:43:47.324I'm over here on Success Island.0:43:47.344 --> 0:43:47.864And I want to be like,0:43:49.005 --> 0:43:50.585you either lucked out and0:43:50.605 --> 0:43:51.846then good for you that you0:43:51.885 --> 0:43:53.505got to Success Island without failure.0:43:53.525 --> 0:43:53.867But I'm like,0:43:54.047 --> 0:43:57.887my canoe and oar is made out of failure.0:43:58.688 --> 0:44:00.009And that's more reliable, right?0:44:01.371 --> 0:44:02.291I'm going to chuck it.0:44:02.612 --> 0:44:04.092I'm going to give it a shot, right?0:44:04.172 --> 0:44:04.353I mean,0:44:04.373 --> 0:44:06.393I think that's one element that art0:44:06.474 --> 0:44:07.893and music and sports gives0:44:07.914 --> 0:44:10.614you is you are chock full of failure.0:44:11.235 --> 0:44:13.677Like, dude, you will score a goal,0:44:13.697 --> 0:44:14.317but do you know how many0:44:14.336 --> 0:44:15.097times you're going to fail0:44:15.297 --> 0:44:16.737at the thing that scored you the goal?0:44:17.157 --> 0:44:18.137And the only way to do that,0:44:18.157 --> 0:44:18.677do you think you learn0:44:18.777 --> 0:44:19.798anything from doing the0:44:19.898 --> 0:44:21.860triple deke the first time and scoring?0:44:21.960 --> 0:44:22.440You don't.0:44:22.980 --> 0:44:23.039No.0:44:23.594 --> 0:44:24.434And then you double down.0:44:24.795 --> 0:44:26.735So I would say, yeah, I would say bluff.0:44:27.315 --> 0:44:28.016I like acronyms.0:44:28.076 --> 0:44:29.155Bluff, bottom line up front.0:44:29.795 --> 0:44:31.255Fail, first attempt in learning.0:44:31.315 --> 0:44:32.856I would say the only way I0:44:32.896 --> 0:44:35.097was a good radio DJ was I0:44:35.117 --> 0:44:36.356was a crappy radio DJ but0:44:36.436 --> 0:44:38.038wanted it bad enough to go0:44:38.097 --> 0:44:39.938through what Seth Godin, great writer,0:44:39.958 --> 0:44:40.677calls the suck.0:44:40.998 --> 0:44:41.257He's like,0:44:41.277 --> 0:44:42.757the suck will come and you have0:44:42.777 --> 0:44:43.237to like it.0:44:44.039 --> 0:44:45.659And that's why I don't make0:44:45.759 --> 0:44:47.958sweaters or cook hams as my0:44:48.018 --> 0:44:49.400thing because I don't like0:44:49.460 --> 0:44:50.519it to start and I'm not0:44:50.539 --> 0:44:51.360going to go through the suck.0:44:52.260 --> 0:44:52.679Uh, ladies,0:44:52.820 --> 0:44:54.541we'll be back next week and0:44:54.561 --> 0:44:56.282that's one week prior to CSM.0:44:56.302 --> 0:44:57.543What do we want to talk about next week?0:44:57.603 --> 0:44:58.724Any ideas or we'll come up0:44:58.744 --> 0:45:00.626with them or happy to take some thoughts,0:45:01.485 --> 0:45:01.565uh,0:45:02.027 --> 0:45:03.226to any of our social channels from the0:45:03.286 --> 0:45:04.628audience of what we'd like to discuss.0:45:04.807 --> 0:45:05.929We have done some previous0:45:05.969 --> 0:45:06.929live streams and episodes0:45:07.050 --> 0:45:08.291on what we're going to,0:45:08.331 --> 0:45:09.291what we're presenting on,0:45:09.311 --> 0:45:10.271what we're looking forward to.0:45:10.652 --> 0:45:11.552So I'll just throw it out there.0:45:11.672 --> 0:45:12.713If the audience wants to0:45:13.114 --> 0:45:14.094hear us discuss something0:45:14.253 --> 0:45:15.074always open to it,0:45:15.135 --> 0:45:16.956you can throw it in the old smorgasbord.0:45:17.916 --> 0:45:18.617Um, that's all I got.0:45:18.637 --> 0:45:19.458I like it.0:45:20.047 --> 0:45:20.608They say the best0:45:20.648 --> 0:45:22.032conversations happen in happy hour.0:45:22.494 --> 0:45:23.014Thanks for coming on.